All I have to do is dream

Remember the blog project I did last year with three other women? Well, Froggie decided to resurrect it with me and we each got to invite another friend to join us. She invited a mutual friend (someone I met through her) and I invited a friend whose blog I really enjoy reading. So now it's Froggie, Mom of Many, Moma Rock and Merrylandgirl. Hope you enjoy the topics that we'll be exploring!

This week, Moma Rock picked the topic: What would your dream job be? It can be anything (or one that you already have)... the sky's the limit!

Before reading ahead, first see what everyone else had to say on this topic:

Froggie

Mom of Many

Moma Rock

Originally, I would have said that I want to star on Broadway, but I don't want to live in or near New York, so that kind of makes such a dream rather difficult. After writing my "legendary" post, I realized that I now have a different dream job.

Wait for it...

Professional Reader!

Yes, I would want a job where I could be paid to do what I love best...read. The catch would be that I'd get to choose all the books and the reading venue. "Supplies" would be covered in full and beverages at Starbucks would be expensed. (It's my dream job, so why not?) I would review every book, but that's par for the course. I'd get commission on all books sold based on my review (there'd be a way to track this in my dream job world). I would never be made to feel like this was a "job" per se, but more like something enjoyable and relaxing that still brought in a decent salary. The next best thing would be getting paid to eat ice cream, but it would have to be a magical calorie-free ice cream or I'd ask for a health club membership to go along with it. (I read while I work out anyway.)

Realistically speaking though, it would be cool to have a job in the book business. I'd love to be an editor or book publicist. I'd also love even more to be an author, but I need to get the motivation going to write again. It's been too long!

Therefore, professional reader it is! (Til' that happens, I still plan to read for fun.)

No small sacrifice

Remember the blog project I did last year with three other women? Well, Froggie decided to resurrect it with me and we each got to invite another friend to join us. She invited a mutual friend (someone I met through her) and I invited a friend whose blog I really enjoy reading. So now it's Froggie, Mom of Many, Moma Rock and Merrylandgirl. Hope you enjoy the topics that we'll be exploring!

This week, Froggie picked the topic: You have to give up something up for 30 days, what would you give up and how do you think giving that up will change your life? (Or, have you given up something for a period of time - what was your experience like?)

Before reading ahead, first see what everyone else had to say on this topic:

Froggie

Mom of Many

Moma Rock

I've decided to go with the alternative option in this set of questions, as I am already used to giving up things for long periods of time. I have found something positive from the things I will be discussing today.

The Meat We Eat (or Don't Eat)

In 2003, I decided to start keeping Kosher. This was something my (soon-to-be) husband and I agreed upon prior to starting the next step in our life together. We wanted to take it in small steps, as it would be less overwhelming and eventually easier to stick with. The first step that summer was to stop eating meat and dairy together. We even set a time of three hours between eating meat and dairy separately, if we ate the meat item first. This meant no more cheeseburgers or chicken parmigiana. Thai chicken pizza was out of the question, as well. If we wanted dessert right after we ate meat, we would have something pareve (dairy-free). We continued to increase the time between meat and dairy every year until we reached our limit of six hours.

Along with this change in our diet, we started cutting out the non-Kosher meat, as well. My husband stopped eating all of it (beef and poultry) before I did. I took smaller steps, first by giving up beef in 2006, on our three year "Kosher anniversary" (the day we started keeping Kosher) and then poultry in 2007 (at the same time the following year). I will admit that this was a hard change, as I still miss some items from my non-Kosher meat days. The things I miss the most are Wendy's cheeseburgers, breaded chicken croissant sandwiches from Portillo's, chicken garlic lo mein from Yen Yen and prime rib from Wildfire, just to name a few. Since my parents are so kind as to get Kosher meat for us when we come to town, I don't have to miss their cooking, thankfully. My husband makes delicious chicken marsala, sweet and sour chicken, hamburgers and ribs. If he can perfectly replicate soup from Journey's End, I have faith that he'll one day be able to make the chicken garlic lo mein we used to love so much. I feel so much better about eating only Kosher meat now, as the process for obtaining the meat in the first place (to put it nicely) is more humane and everything is blood-free. It's so much healthier in general. And after hearing what went on in a documentary called "Food," I don't regret giving up non-Kosher meat at all.

50 First (and Last) Kisses

There is a halachic ritual called taharat hamishpachot (family purity), which involves a married couple becoming physically separated during the time of a woman's cycle and for an extra week beyond, until the woman goes to the mikvah (ritual bath). To keep it clean here, they basically can't so much as hold hands or pass each other items during this time. When a woman has a baby, the time of separation is a lot longer.

I have been participating in this ritual since marriage. Just like with kashrut, I started off in baby steps. I even took private classes to learn more about it. (I'm still friends with my teacher.) Just like with giving up non-Kosher meat, this is also difficult at times. It was the hardest after my first son's birth, as I was super emotional and just wanted to hug my husband and knew I couldn't. However, it got easier over time. The six weeks off made a normal two weeks off seem like a breeze in comparison. We also had to rely on verbal communication the entire time. We tend to make each other laugh more when we can't touch each other at all. It's nice to know that we never run out of stuff to say to one another and it has strengthened our bonds of communication that much more. The other difficult thing is planning a vacation around my cycle, especially if other things don't fall into place or if my cycle decides to start early. We were fortunate when we went to Vegas that my cycle was on schedule. However, I was all worried that it was going to start early anyway. (A vacation alone would totally suck if we couldn't so much as kiss or share a bed.) There were other times when this became a difficulty, as well. Maybe it's also the reason we don't go on vacation much, but it wouldn't stop us from doing something special for our kids.

When it comes to mikvah night, the first kiss after I return home is like the first kiss ever (minus the awkwardness). So imagine coming home once a month to a first kiss. That adds up over time and it makes the whole separation experience worthwhile, as well. The experience of going to the mikvah is also very special. The mikvah lady makes every woman feel like a queen. I feel so rejuvenated after I've dipped. I also use the time in the mikvah to pray for everyone and everything that is important to me.

Over time, the physical separation has bothered me less than it did in the beginning. I know that it is making our marriage even stronger and I also appreciate that I get some "me time" out of the deal. In the past, we used to take turns between sleeping in the bed or sleeping on an air mattress. When we moved to Maryland, we got separate twin beds (that can be joined when we're able to sleep in the same bed again). I think this also helps me feel better about the separation time, as the air mattress tended to be uncomfortable. In the meantime, I still get kisses and hugs from my kids and thankfully they don't question why my husband and I don't kiss or touch when we're not allowed to. (When we are allowed to, they tease us for kissing too much.) This ritual allows us to cherish the time we do get to be together in the physical sense. Every kiss could be the last for a while, so we make the most of it.

As you can see, I am experienced with giving things up for extended periods of time. While both have had their challenges, they've also had many rewards that outweighed the challenges altogether. I've now gone almost two months without touching my husband since our daughter was born. However, cuddling with her also makes the reason why we aren't touching just as special and meaningful. I'd gladly challenge any married couple who hasn't tried or experienced family purity to give up all physical contact for at least a week, just to see what the experience is truly like. I have a feeling they might be pleasantly surprised.

If I had a million dollars... (or something like that)

Remember the blog project I did last year with three other women? Well, Froggie decided to resurrect it with me and we each got to invite another friend to join us. She invited a mutual friend (someone I met through her) and I invited a friend whose blog I really enjoy reading. So now it's Froggie, Mom of Many, Moma Rock and Merrylandgirl. Hope you enjoy the topics that we'll be exploring!

This week, Mom of Many picked the topic: If I gave you 250,000 what would you do with it?

Before reading ahead, first see what everyone else had to say on this topic:
Froggie
Mom of Many
Moma Rock

Had this been real money, I would put it towards college for my children. However, this is hypothetical money, so I'm going to have some fun with it! Therefore, it would be our vacation fund.

I haven't been on a real vacation in years. I don't count visits to family out of town as vacations. I'm talking about touristy travel spots. When my oldest kid was a baby, my husband and I went to Las Vegas. That was over five years ago! I wouldn't even mind taking the kids as long as they had stuff to do.

The first priority would be to go back to Israel. I'd want to show my kids all the places featured in the Torah. I'd also want to go back to the Dead Sea. Safed was really cool too. Most importantly, I'd want to take them to the Western Wall. That's where I placed the prayer that was answered, making their existence possible.

Next, I'd take my kids to Disney World. It's something I really want to do with them. I haven't been there since 1988 and I know so much has changed since then.

I'd also want to go on another cruise. Cruises are so much fun and it's a great way to visit new islands. I know there would be lots of activities for the kids so that I could get in some relaxation time, and perhaps even a massage. Along with that, I'd want to go to an all-inclusive resort. We went to Sandals in St. Lucia for our honeymoon and I still think about that place a lot. (especially whenever I hear "Hey Ya" by Outkast.) This might be a kid-free excursion though. (It's my hypothetical money and I am putting trips for the kids first. I deserve this much, at least.)

Another item on my bucket list is to tour Europe. Spots on that tour would be London, Amsterdam, Italy, Paris (if just to see the Eiffel Tower) and Greece.

Finally, I'd go back to Vegas. I'm so enthralled with that city. I know my late paternal grandfather would also want me to go there many more times in my life. He may even want his namesake (a.k.a. my daughter) to check it out.

I probably went over my limit, but I'm sure I used a good bargain travel service and drove whenever possible to save on flight costs. Hypothetical as this was, I really do want to go on a nice vacation with my family (and hopefully get a date or two with my husband out of the deal, as well).

Legen...wait for it...dary

Remember the blog project I did last year with three other women? Well, Froggie decided to resurrect it with me and we each got to invite another friend to join us. She invited a mutual friend (someone I met through her) and I invited a friend whose blog I really enjoy reading. So now it's Froggie, Mom of Many, Moma Rock and Merrylandgirl. Hope you enjoy the topics that we'll be exploring!

This week, I picked the topic: What experience for you has been the most legendary? (Or, what would be legendary if you got the opportunity to experience it?)

(I got this idea from Barney always saying "legendary" on "How I Met Your Mother" and also was inspired by my friend's crazy birthing experience last week.)

Before reading ahead, first see what everyone else had to say on this topic:
Froggie
Mom of Many
Moma Rock

I have talked about some legendary experiences in past blogs, such as waiting in line for "Rent" tickets all day long and meeting celebrities, such as Joey McIntyre. However, the experience I wanted to talk about today is something that is still going strong and has lasted almost a year already. I'm talking about Chick Lit Central, my group and blog for all things chick lit related.

I first started the group in the summer of 2009, but nothing really came of it at the time and I ignored it after a while. Last spring, I decided to start it up again after talking to a few friends about chick lit novels, partaking in status short story contests on Rowan Coleman's Facebook page and entering contests to win books (I won a few within a short period of time). I decided to invite more people to the Facebook group and started a blog to accompany what would be talked about in this group. I originally was just going to do book reviews and talk about authors I liked. Then I decided to open it up to interviews and giveaways. I was inspired by Sarah Pekkanen, who personally e-mailed me to offer her first book, "The Opposite of Me" for review. (I loved it, by the way.) She also hosted a giveaway on my Facebook group. Soon, I was contacting authors and asking to do interviews and giveaways. My first interview was with Allie Larkin, who was also a debut author with an excellent novel called "Stay." We did a giveaway, as well. There was only a small turnout for the giveaway, but the winner was happy when they were picked. I then did one with Allison Winn Scotch to promote her third novel, "The One that I Want." That also received only a small turnout, but it was still a lot of fun to put together.

Around this time, I received feedback from a publicist who thought I was too much in everyone's face. Her advice actually was helpful and allowed me to handle things with my group a different way. I earned more respect from authors as a result. I also started to get more of a following with my group and blog. In the meantime, I was continuing to post interviews and giveaways, as well as book reviews. I was also starting to receive a lot of complimentary book copies for reviews. It was pure Heaven for me...the latest books at my fingertips without having to go to a bookstore. What more could a bookaholic ask for?!?

In July, I went to a Borders in Virginia to hear Jennifer Weiner speak. When we got to have our books signed, I told her who I was and the recognition was immediate! She was even easier to talk to, as a result. A few weeks prior to that, I got to meet Sarah Pekkanen in person and we did a video interview for the blog.

Around this time, I also asked my friend Melissa P. to become partners for the group and blog. She started to help with interviews and we had a great time discussing what was in store for Chick Lit Central. We also vented to each other when that was needed.

Throughout the rest of the year, we continued to host interviews and giveaways. We had at least one a week. Sometimes even more! I also became friends with a few other book bloggers and connected them with authors and publishers if I felt it would be helpful for their blogs. I even got to know some authors really well and formed a friendship with them. I've had publishers contact me to promote new books, as well. At the end of 2010, I was able to do a huge giveaway to celebrate reaching 1000 members on Facebook. Thanks to the authors I knew already, there were tons of books up for grabs. It was really exciting to host such a huge giveaway. Finally, my reviews are being taken into consideration more and authors seem to appreciate them more than they would a random review. Some have even re-posted them on their Facebook pages.

We're only a few months into 2011 and I've been constantly busy with Chick Lit Central related stuff. It's almost like a second job, except I get paid in books (I even listed it as one on LinkedIn). After I had my baby in February, I had comments on my Facebook page from a bunch of the authors I knew. I think this whole experience reached legendary status when my sister called me to ask me if the Kristin Hannah commented on one of my daughter's pictures. The other thing that told me that my blog had "arrived" was when Melissa P. and I got invited to contribute a blog post to International Chick Lit Month. As of today, we have 1,113 members on Facebook, 1,072 followers on Twitter and 367 followers on our blog.

There is more in store for Chick Lit Central this spring and summer, as I have more author interviews and giveaways lined up. I also have some fun ideas for how to celebrate my blogaversary next month. All in all, this group and blog has been legendary for me. I hope it will last for a long time, but I know that no matter how long it does last, I will be talking about it for years to come. I also hope that I'll be able to pass along my love for chick lit to my daughter someday.