Our blog project group has once again changed by one member, but I'm still calling it Blog Project 3.0. The newest member is Darwin Shrugged, a friend of Froggie's. I recently got to know her better through "52 Stories" and I look forward to what she has to say on the upcoming topics.
This week Darwin Shrugged chose the topic: Do you believe everything happens for a reason?
First, read what everyone else had to share on this topic:
Darwin Shrugged
Froggie
Moma Rock
There are a couple of concepts in Judaism that I wanted to bring up. The first is saying "B'shaah Tovah" to someone who is pregnant. Then again, I'd say it to myself for all my pregnancies. It means "all in good time" and it's a way of not jinxing the pregnancy. This goes along with the other concept, which is "besherte." It means "meant to be." If it's supposed to happen, it will. I attribute my relationship with my husband to besherte. I also consider other situations in life to be an act of besherte, such as helping my husband find some long lost cousins and having them become best friends with my parents as a result. Or the timing of how some of my friendships came about.
If you think about it, everything really comes down to fate. Being in the right place at the right time. Saying the right thing to the right person. Either you luck out or you don't. There was an episode of How I Met Your Mother (yes, I still reference this show even though I'm not over the series finale yet) where Ted was using a set of circumstances to tie to how he met the mother. However, he didn't actually meet the mother in that episode, but instead the events of the day put him in the right place at the right time so he could get closure from a past relationship. I resented the teaser that came out of that episode and didn't really know how it led to him meeting the mother, but I guess having the closure allowed him to move on. Maybe he wouldn't have been in a place to meet the mother six years later if he didn't have it? Having said that, in the second to last season, there's an episode where he runs into another girl he dated and she tells him that her roommate (whom is implied to be the mother) is in a band and they book her to play at the wedding in the final season. So that's an act of fate in itself. The couple that was getting married had intended to get a DJ but then they couldn't pass up the opportunity to get the band, once it was offered. If they hadn't, Ted may have never met the mother.
This all leads me to think about time travel movies where if you change one circumstance, everything else changes as a result. Like when Marty McFly almost kept his parents from dating in Back to the Future, he saw the possibility of his existence being wiped away. Or how in The Butterfly Effect, Ashton Kutcher's character kept going back to certain situations and changing one aspect, thus affecting the entire course of his life after that point. The title of the movie is related to a time travel story where someone goes back to the time of the dinosaurs and steps on a butterfly, thus altering everything else from that point forward. Yes, just from stepping on a butterfly. I forgot the title of that story, but I think it was also made into a movie at some point. In any case, the Ashton Kutcher movie is really intense, but also thought provoking. I found myself crying at the end. Until someone invents an actual time machine that really works, I think we're safe from any literal or metaphorical butterfly effects.
There's also the concept of why bad things happen to good people. I know there's even a book about it. If everything happened for a reason, how does that explain the horrible things that can happen to people over the course of their lives? What reason would there be for wiping out populations or for innocent children to suffer? I was recently reading an article about one of the Cleveland kidnapping victims. It was awful to hear what she went through and I was impressed that she held out enough hope to keep herself going even in the worst moments. What reason is there for her, or even the other two victims, to have been in that situation? I dare someone to come up with one.
Having said all this, my answer to Darwin Shrugged's question is a resounding NO.
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2 comments:
Interesting. So, do you equate fate and coincidence? Very thoughtful post. And interesting how, even though you've taken a different route, you end up at the same place as me!
Your last paragraph did pose an interesting thought. If things happen for a reason, why do bad things happen to people? Was it meant to be? That's a very good point. I've had bad things happen, esp. in my youth. I can now look back and find the silver lining and see how it's made me a better person, but I think you're right in that I didn't deserve it, as most of us don't. Very good point!
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