An old July post

Got this gem from livejournal. I still can relate now.

July 10th, 2006, 02:39 pm
10 more days!
That's it. I have 10 days left to enjoy being 29 before I get to enjoy being 30. I'm excited about what lies ahead. First is my party on Saturday. I have no clue what is in store and I love being surprised. My husband and some friends planned this out and they're doing a good job keeping everything secret. Then my real birthday is a week from Thursday. I'm hoping my sister will babysit so that my husband and I can enjoy a movie in the theater for once! Eitan turns 10 months this Thursday, so that's exciting too. :) My parents are taking me to dinner the Sunday after my birthday, which should also be nice.

I'm listening to a country station online and "Something's Gotta Give" by Leann Rimes is on. I named this journal for that song. I think it is because I feel like I'm constantly expecting the worst to happen. Like I want Hashem to give me a break sometimes. Even when something seems perfect, it's not always that way. I could be less vague, but I don't really want to. :P The video for this song is so cute!

We went to St. Joseph, MI this past weekend. It was so nice. The weather was perfect and we got to go to the beach. Eitan loved playing in the sand. It was so cute to watch him in action. We took him in the lake too. And, of course, we got Kilwin's. Our friends who came with us didn't get Kilwin's because their children were having meltdowns (which is causing me to fear the toddler stage and the onset of "the terrible twos", and Eitan is barely even 1 yet). Oh well... We had a great time and Eitan did well on his first actual "vacation". He slept better than he has in weeks!

I finished "Swapping Lives" by Jane Green last week. It was so good! There were a lot of references to "Desperate Housewives". I saw a little of myself in both the women. I know I never want to be single again and it's only because I have found my beshert. If I didn't know any different, I'd probably still be having fun seeing what is out there. However, that is not to be and I'm madly in love with the two boys in my life (in different ways, of course).

My 4th of July was fun last week, but I felt out of place. I felt like I had nothing to talk about with anyone...even people I feel I have close friendships with. I've realized recently that I'm between two worlds. One is of the observant Jews and one is of the secular Jews and non-Jews. I don't fit neatly into either world and I don't feel I should have to completely conform either. Just like I wouldn't give up keeping Kosher or start shopping on Saturdays again, I also wouldn't wear a shaytel and long sleeves/long skirts all the time. I like the Shabbos rules I've established for myself, my husband, and Eitan. I know I'll get a few eye rolls from my family and secular friends. However, I have so much support from my husband's family and the other observant Jews out there. I still realize that I have a ways to go if I ever wanted to be Shomer Shabbos. It's an uphill climb, but I have us off to a good start.

Before I forget...Eitan liked the fireworks, but he fell asleep shortly after they started. Better that than his "drama king" hysterics. :)

That's all for now!

Follow up: I find it interesting that my livejournal name was so negative in relation to my name for this blog, which has a positive feel to it. Not sure where the outlook changed, but it just did. I still like the song "Something's Gotta Give" though.

We haven't been to St. Joseph since this last post. We did go to Kilwin's while we were in SC back in May. Their ice cream is still the best! I know there's one in Annapolis, but we have yet to head out that way.

My older son still likes fireworks. My younger son does too. He was so fascinated!

I find it funny that I mentioned a book by Jane Green, since I did an interview and giveaway for Jane Green on my Chick Lit Central blog yesterday. (It runs until Thursday at midnight, if you're interested. ;) )

Since I wrote this livejournal post, I have become Shomer Shabbos. It's been over three years. I'm proud of how far I've come with it, regardless of what people with secular values think. I think it has caused some stress between my parents and me, but when they come to visit us in Maryland and see how nice and relaxing Shabbos can be, I know they believe that I made a good choice for myself and my family. It's just not a choice that fits in well with their lifestyle in their home (such as us not allowing the TV to be on in front of us or the kids). I am flexible with the choices they make when they stay in my home on Shabbos. I just hope they can be as understanding about my choices (when I'm in a non-Shomer Shabbat home) someday, without needing to roll their eyes. This past Shabbos, we had a nice family meal and some friends joined us too. Saturday started off a bit slow but then picked up when friends came over to visit. The visits were non-stop until Shabbat was almost over. It was nice seeing so many friends again. It felt similar to how Shabbat is in our neighborhood. People host each other for meals and then friends get together in the afternoon. We try to host an afternoon gathering every so often, when friends can come over to play board games or just hang out and chat.

And for the record, two weeks to go until my birthday. Not that it's a big deal this year, but I still love having birthdays, regardless of the sad holiday with which this one happens to coincide.