The things I never got to say

I've been blogging with three fabulous women for two years and have been enjoying all the fun topics we come up with week after week. If you want to see what we've discussed in the past, check out our posts here.

This week, Moma Rock chose the topic: We've all been in a situation where we wish we'd had the last word with something (like in an argument or debate), and never got the chance to. What situation presented itself where you wanted to have that last word, but didn't get the chance? Why didn't you? And, if you had that chance again, what would you say?

Before reading ahead, first see what everyone else had to say on this topic:
Froggie
Mom of Many
Moma Rock

These days, I usually try to reach a compromise when there's an argument. Of course, I get the last word when the argument is between myself and one of my kids, much to their chagrin. However, there's a person from my past with whom I never got the last word. I just let the "friendship" dissolve because she was such an awful person. (Or a "nasty b*tch," as Romy said to her tormentor in Romy and Michele's High School Reunion.) That summer, I stopped speaking to her altogether and it's not like she made an effort to contact me either. That's a relief, at least. However, there are times when I wonder what it would have been like to tell her off. She's the toxic friend I talked about shortly after starting my blog. I thought about this more while watching an episode of The Big Bang Theory where Leonard confronts a bully from high school. (I have tried to look her up online for morbid curiosity reasons....I wanted to see if she became a burnt-out loser in the style of certain celebrities who have hit rock bottom in recent years. I didn't find anything though. I guess she's not an attention whore like she used to be.) In lieu of this, I've decided to write out what my last words would have been, had eloquent 36 year-old me gone back into the mind and body of my 18 year-old self. (Keep in mind that I wouldn't get to tell her anything that happens in our futures, including reaming her out about the library incident.) At the time, I was too afraid to tell her off, thinking she'd turn my friends against me. Knowing what I know now, I would have gladly gone back in time and done it! I'm only using initials in this "letter." It is intended to be written at the beginning of July, 1994.

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L,
My last semester of high school, which was supposed to be fun and carefree, was more like a season of torture thanks to my "friendship" with you (if one could even call it a friendship at all). I don't know where you get off thinking you have any control over my life. First of all, you're a sophomore and I'm a senior. By your standards of age-appropriate socialization, I really should have nothing to do with you. Considering that my sister is only a year behind you in school and apparently you're too mature to hang out with freshmen "babies," then I'm too mature to be hanging out with sophomore "toddlers." Having said that, my sister has way more of a right to be riding around in my car than you do. After all, unless YOU paid for my car and the gasoline that goes into it, you have no say in who should be riding in my car and how loud or soft my radio should be playing. So the mere fact that you b*tched me out in the commons for saying that my sister was going to be riding in my car at the same time as you, K and N, is completely ridiculous. I should have stopped being friends with you right then and there, but I was worried about losing K and N. You also had no right to sulk over my sister being in MY car, let alone ream me out about it even more afterward. What is wrong with you?!?

And that's not all. No, not even close. There's the issue of the senior class party. The one K, N and I were supposed to go to TOGETHER. However, you and your selfish possessiveness of K made that a non-reality. Yes, N and I still went and we still had fun, but I was royally pissed because K really WAS supposed to be with us. You even used a guy as bait. Not sure why since it meant you wouldn't have quality "alone time" with K. It would make you the third wheel. I'm sure there was something in it for you, and I'm not even sure what it might be. Oh, and telling me that K wasn't at your house that weekend was sure to backfire when her mom said otherwise. Better yet, trying to tell me that K wasn't coming to my graduation party. Sorry, but that backfired too. I just wish you hadn't been there too. I love the whole fake thing at the end of the night, when you were trying to be all "we're such a great group of friends." Too bad N was on to your games even before I was. I didn't appreciate the crap you pulled on her by cancelling plans for everyone to go to Great America and then going with K anyway. That was low. N had every right to be upset that weekend! You also "drove" me....to go to Rocky Horror that weekend and dance around in my underwear. Oh, and get this, when I told you about the experience, you said it was gross. That was classic coming from someone who bragged to us about her slutty conquests.

Oh, you had one good idea in all the time we ever hung out....getting separate checks at any restaurant we went to. Want to know why?!? Because you give horrible tips. Having experience in the restaurant industry, I was appalled any time I saw what you left servers, especially if they didn't do anything wrong. I felt I should tip more, only to compensate for what they were losing out on from you. I'm glad we never dined together at the restaurant where I work. I only hope you had the same server more than once at any restaurant you've done this at so that they would remember your lousy tips and leave you something extra "special" in your food.

Guess what...K, N and I figured out what an awful person you are and none of us want anything to do with you. I think that we each reached our final straw points with you. I am pretty sure I know what N's was, and I think she stuck around for the same reasons I did. I don't know exactly what K's was, but I'm glad she figured out that you were treating her like your puppet. Mine definitely was when we were going to go to the Spaghetti Warehouse and you went all backseat driver on me and then flipped out at ME because I got even slightly annoyed with your antics. I don't even know why we all went to Great America as a group after that time. The whole day was spent watching you and N fight over something to do with K. All I know is that I'm done with you and never want to see you again. I know you'll probably amount to nothing when you grow up (if that ever even happens), especially given how selfish, rude and immature you are. I'm sorry I ever had to deal with you in the first place, but that's what I get for wanting to please my friends.

Good riddance,
M

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This was definitely a therapeutic exercise. I encourage you to do this if you harbor the same kind of resentment toward someone with whom you have no contact anymore. Thanks, Moma Rock, for the opportunity!