Now that "American Idol" is on 3 nights for the next few weeks....

....I get way more knitting done! Especially with it being 2 hours each night for the first two nights. It's definitely growing but I feel that it doesn't look like a scarf. Time will tell, I guess. My older son likes when I knit in his room while he's getting ready for bed. He practically begs me to knit at that time! It's very sweet though. :)

From McDonald's to Mikvah

This blog was inspired by Charmingly Random's blog about religion.

When I was growing up, my weekends involved going to temple on Friday nights and going to the mall, movies, birthday parties, fast food restaurants, or doing other fun things on Saturday morning and afternoon. I loved the ritual of going to temple. I’d even bring my Cabbage Patch Kid and pretend that I was the mommy taking them to temple. I wouldn’t leave the building without saying “Shabbat Shalom” to the Rabbi.

As I got older, I started going to Hebrew school and training for my Bat Mitzvah. I enjoyed learning Hebrew once I was able to pick up on it. I even taught myself the trope symbols necessary to chant my Haftarah. My Bat Mitzvah service was a very meaningful experience that I still think about occasionally.

After I became a Bat Mitzvah, I took confirmation classes. I didn’t enjoy those as much and didn’t really get a lot out of them as I had hoped. The summer before I started high school, I went to a Jewish overnight camp (Beber). It was a great experience. I loved how everyone came together for Shabbat. We all had services, a nice meal in the dining hall and Israeli dancing under the stars.

When I was a freshman in high school, I got involved with BBG and CFTY. At first I liked BBG, but later became more interested and involved with CFTY instead. I liked the meaningful and spiritual factors of CFTY. I also met some great friends through it, some of whom I am still in touch with today. Around this time, I also joined the speech team at my school and we went to tournaments every Saturday in the fall and winter.

Meanwhile, we had family friends who were Modern Orthodox and invited us to dine in their Sukkah every autumn. I loved and looked forward to that experience. Sometimes it was combined with Shabbos. It was such a beautiful experience overall. Around this time, I read a book called “What Happened to Heather Hopkowitz? It resonated with me at the time and I still think about it as an adult. I even used it for a discussion about books for Jewish adolescents in one of my classes in college.

While I was in college, I felt I slipped away from Judaism in the beginning. There were no temples within walking distance and I was the only Jewish person amongst my friends for a while. The Hillel on campus didn’t interest me much and it felt like it contained the things that I didn’t like about BBG. Then I met my first boyfriend during freshman year. He was Jewish and I think being with him helped spark a renewed interest in Judaism. We didn’t talk about it a lot and never went to temple together, but it was nice to share in Jewish holidays and be able to talk about family customs. I started going to temple just on the High Holidays, as well. Toward the end of my college days, my Jewish side came out more. When I lived off campus, I was able to light the menorah (no rules about candles, like in the dorms) and make matzo ball soup.

While I still let the world know I was Jewish after I graduated from college, I was pretty low key about my observance level. I’d still go out on Friday nights and Saturday afternoons. Most of the time was spent in the city. I spent the High Holidays with my family, but even that was minimal time in temple and just eating food afterward. In the summer of 2001, one of my best friends left to study for a year in Israel. His departure motivated me to go on a Birthright trip in early 2002. While I was there, I promised to make some changes to my overall lifestyle if I could be given a good love relationship in return (I would have also taken the opportunity to be part of the Comedy Sportz troupe as another option). I put this promise in the Western Wall, sealing the deal. In the meantime, I decided that I wanted to start becoming more involved in the Jewish community. Being in Israel really inspired me to want more out of Judaism. By the end of the trip, the educational leader said that I was “shining.”

A few weeks after I returned from Israel, I met the love of my life. It was through one of his friends and involved being in the right place and saying the right thing at the right time. Complete besherte! I had asked if my (now) husband liked going to temple, as I wanted to start going again. It turned out that he went to temple every Saturday morning. I also found out later that his friend matched us up for a reason besides bowling…that we both liked to say “besherte.” We met later that week and eventually started going to temple together. It was a nice experience and I looked forward to it every week. A month later, he took me to an event called Makor. It’s a Shabbos dinner program that takes place around the Lakeview/Lincoln Park area of Chicago. People get grouped into different homes for a Shabbos meal and then they all convene at one location afterward for social time. The first meal I went to was really enjoyable and it brought back the feelings I had when I went to a Shabbos dinner in our family friends’ Sukkah. We continued to go throughout the year and got other friends involved. Eventually, we tried to start our own group in the suburbs but didn’t have enough funding for more than 2 dinners. It was a nice program to organize though.

Around this same time, we had gone to Cleveland a few times to visit my husband’s family and enjoy some Shabbos weekends together. I loved the Shabbos meals my (now) mother-in-law hosted when we came for a visit. The first time I was there was during Sukkot. I got to relive the Shabbos in the Sukkah feel once again. Spending Shabbos with my future family was definitely another inspiration for me to become more observant.

After we got engaged in 2003, we decided to start on a path of keeping Kosher together. We took all our plates, cookware, utensils, etc. to the mikvah (after dipping everything in boiling water first). To celebrate this new plan, we decided to first stop mixing meat and dairy and also wait three hours before having dairy after a meat meal. Over the next few years, we expanded our Kosher rules to ease our way into things. Nowadays, I no longer eat non-Kosher meat. That was the hugest thing for me to give up. It meant no more burgers at Wendys! However, by that time we were living in NJ and surrounded by Kosher restaurants.

Later in 2003, I decided that we should have a Shabbos meal every Friday night instead of going out on the town. We adopted that custom and met some friends around that time with whom we shared in a lot of Shabbos meals. Maybe that was another sign from Hashem that we were headed in the right direction in regards to observance.

When we got married in 2004, we had all Kosher food at our wedding. We also followed some customs that my brother-in-law introduced to us at his wedding (badeken ceremony, walking around in a circle 7 times, the yichud room, etc). However, there was mixed seating and dancing at our reception. I don’t think I could have had it any other way.

Meanwhile, we were looking for a shul (I started referring to temple as shul when I became more observant) at which we’d both feel comfortable attending Shabbos services. After we got married, we found one! We were one of the only young couples, but everyone was really nice and the Rabbi was wonderful. We met one of our close friends through that shul, as well. It was a Traditional congregation. They followed the format of an Orthodox service, but there was no mechitzah.

Upon becoming husband and wife, we chose to participate in the custom of Taharat Hamishpachot. It means family purity. To put it nicely, a husband can not so much as touch his wife, or vice versa (or even sleep in the same bed) during the two “unclean” weeks of her cycle, until she has immersed in a ritual bath called a mikvah (not the same as the one used to make utensils Kosher). The whole experience is very meaningful and it allows spouses to get to know each other outside of the physical realm and really talk to each other. And for those who think TWO weeks are hard, try SIX (or more) after giving birth! I took classes to learn more about the process and reasons behind it and became friends with my teacher. She even invited us over for Shabbos meals from time to time, as well as a meal during Sukkot.

When our first son was born, we decided on giving him only a Hebrew name (that would be used at home and shul). There’s a custom to not reveal the name until the bris (or naming ceremony for a girl). I didn’t like the custom the first time, but came to an agreement that we’d only reveal the name if people were dying to know and couldn’t wait until the bris. At the bris, it felt so special to share the name with people hearing it for the first time, that we decided to completely wait on sharing our second son’s name until the bris. When our first son turned 3, we had a hair cutting ceremony called an upsherin and he started wearing a kipah at that time, as well as tzitzis later on.

Before we moved to NJ in 2007, we started easing our way into becoming Shomer Shabbos (and Yom Tov). We started out with a few rules and expanded it after we got comfortable with that. It meant no more shopping, movies, watching TV, checking e-mail, etc. from Friday sundown to Saturday sundown. When we moved to NJ, we became completely Shomer Shabbos and it felt natural because we were within walking distance of the shul and our friends in the community weren’t tempting us to go out with them on Saturday afternoon because they were in the same place we were.

I feel that we’re at a good place right now in terms of our observance level. We have a nice balance of spirituality and a connection with the secular world. We now live in a great community where most of our friends are in the same place as we are with their observance. I love participating in all the women rituals of challah, candles and mikvah. I love the shul where we daven. I love how interested my kids are in Judaism and how they sing Hebrew songs and talk about all the holidays. I love that my Friday night “dates” with my husband involve sitting at the dining room table with soft candle light in the background and warm challah on our plates. I really think I was meant to get to this place in my life.

My late maternal grandma was observant for a while and even kept Kosher when my mom was growing up. Later, she slipped out of it when my mom moved out and started her own rituals. I think my grandma would be very proud of how far I’ve come. A while ago, someone told me how when we light the Shabbos candles, we’re praying for the tradition to continue through future generations, just like our ancestors and past relatives have prayed for our generation to light Shabbos candles. Also, I am proud of my parents for regaining interest in Judaism through a shul they’ve become involved with. They made a promise to their Rabbi to light candles, say Kiddush over wine and eat challah every Friday night. They’re proud of themselves for it, as well. It’s so nice to see their renewed interest in Judaism and I think it has brought us even closer together as a family. I only hope we’re instilling strong values in our sons to keep up the traditions and start them in their own families in the future.

A note about a quote!

I have a few friends who knit and blog and we've decided to embark on a blog project that has nothing to do with knitting. We're going to take turns coming up with a topic every Thursday and we each have to blog about it by the end of that day and post links to each other's blogs so that people can see our different perspectives on the same topic.

Check out the backstory about how the project was conceived and how we all came together.

Here are the other blogs:
Froggie Knits Like Crazy
Charmingly Random
Desperate Madness

This week's topic comes from Desperate Madness: Your favorite quote and what it means to you

Here goes:

"Opportunity is not a lengthy visitor." Stephen Sondheim, "Into the Woods"

I chose this quote because I like the meaning behind it. I first heard it in "Into the Woods", as it was said by Cinderella. I can't remember the context behind the statement, but I've always liked the thought. I even directed a scene in my high school directing class where I used this quote as the motivating force behind the scene. I think it was regarding "Waiting for Godot," but I can't remember why I linked up the two. All I know is that it came together nicely.

I feel that the basic premise behind the quote is that once an opportunity comes along, you should seize it, as it is not going to last forever. I'm sure there are countless examples of this in my own life. Maybe it keeps me from procrastinating just a little bit. I definitely think it applies to my job hunts. I think that when a job is posted, it can be easily snatched up by someone well qualified, but I feel I should dig my heels in and send off my resume. I don't know that it will always be chosen, but I figure that if I don't, the opportunity will be gone. There are times when I'd save the link for a job posting and it would be gone by the time I got around to it. When I was about to interview for my current job, I managed to hit my eye on a shelf. I was worried that this was my way of self-sabotaging against a perfectly nice job. However, I called the interviewer and she was very understanding about rescheduling. I went in two days later and got the job afterward! I could have easily taken my eye injury as a sign not to go for such an opportunity (as my husband's car being towed on the day of his interview was a sign that he should not have taken his current job), but I'm glad I decided to reschedule and it has been well worth the wait (even if the wait was only two days between when I was supposed to interview and when I actually did).

There have been other times where I have decided to just seize the day and see what would come of it. I can't say I'm one for playing the lotto, but I don't like to leave a lot of "what ifs" just sitting out there. Even if it was just giving my phone number to a potential friend. Whether or not they called is a non-issue, but if I hadn't given them my contact information, I'd always wonder if I was losing out on a possible friendship.

Other instances of this quote coming into play:

*Recently telling someone close to me about an amazing career opportunity that they would be perfect for, but they were not ready to take the plunge at this time. I hope another similar opportunity comes up for them in the future.

*Giving my phone number to someone I barely knew so he could pass it along to his friend. At the time, I said "It might be besherte." If I hadn't given him my number at that time, I wouldn't be with the love of my life right now. (As I don't know that I would have ever encountered his friend again to do so.)

*Going to check out our house as soon as it went on the market, even though it meant making a lot of crazy last minute arrangements. We're living there now, as a result. The houses were getting snatched up so quickly in our neighborhood at that time of year, so I feel incredibly fortunate!

In any situation in life, there is going to be that window of opportunity. Once it closes, the opportunity has the potential to be gone for good.

This quote goes along with another quote I like, from "Rent." (I love musical theater, so it makes sense.) "There's only us. There's only this. Forget regret, or life is yours to miss. No other road. No other way. No day but today." Okay, so it's part of a song, but it makes sense to why I like the quote I chose. I think the message behind this quote doesn't need much of an explanation.

Blog Project Backstory

Before I post my blog project entry for this week, I wanted to share briefly about how I know each of the women involved. I want to start by saying that I have a knack for bringing people together who normally might never have met. Some friends of mine are now best friends with each other because I connected them in some way. Most of the time, the connection is between my high school and college friends. This time, it is more random. I basically introduced them to each other because they all live in Illinois and like to knit. They got me motivated to knit, and have been very supportive of my efforts.

I'll start with Froggie:
We met at summer camp back in 1987. I had braces and she was getting them soon, so she struck up a conversation with me. We've been best friends ever since that fateful day and we owe it all to our parents shelling out money for our teeth to look pretty. :) We've gone through a lot together and had our share of ups and downs. These days, we're closer than ever, even despite the miles between us.

Next, there's Charmingly Random:
While I'm usually one of the people who is able to bring others together, CR was brought to me through a connection from a friend. A few years ago, my friend was dating a guy and then they broke up but managed to stay friends. He later started dating CR and brought her to my friends' parties. I thought she was really nice and when we'd all hang out together to play board games, she became part of our "group." When my younger son was a baby, she spent all her time at a gathering knitting socks for him. That was when I first found out that she liked to knit and connected her with Froggie. I don't think they started really talking until more recently.

And now we come to Desperate Madness: I was involved with an online parenting group for moms having babies in September (back when my older son was born). I noticed in her posts that she lived in Illinois, our sons had the same exact birthday, and our sons' names sounded similar. We started e-mailing more often and met up at the mall when our sons were almost 1 year old. When I moved out of state, we continued to e-mail. I eventually found out that she was a knitter and connected her to Froggie, as well. Later, I also connected her with CR since they didn't live far from one another.

This past December, I shared a post with all three friends about a yarn store a friend here was opening. That spurned the knitting discussion that got me to purchase my first set of needles and ball of yarn. :) (Technically, Froggie said something that was the deciding factor in my plans to knit.)

When I started blogging recently, CR commented on a blog I posted to Facebook, saying she needed to get back to blogging again. I came up with the idea for this project from that. I decided to share it with all three friends and we discussed the parameters and how everything would work.

Now that you have the history, I hope you'll enjoy reading our blog project entries every Thursday. They present new challenges to make us think about stuff we wouldn't have thought of before. After you read my entry each week, please check out their entries as well. Not all of them may be posted at the same time (depending on how our weeks are going), but come back over the weekend if you don't see something posted at one of the links. Enjoy!

Taking Broadway to new "Heights"

If you know me, you know how I'm obsessed with "In the Heights." It's an interesting musical for a Jewish girl (originally) from the midwest to become obsessed with. However, this musical resonates with me more than most of the musicals I really like. I rank it above "Wicked" and very close to "Rent" in my list of favorite musicals of all time. The music moves me to sing and dance. Some of it even brings me to tears. I first became interested when I saw the performance of "96,000" on the Tony awards. Then I got the Original Broadway Cast (OBC) recording around October of 2008 and did what I usually do with musicals....learned the songs and the story just through what I was hearing. The first time I heard Vanessa (played by Karen Olivo) sing "It won't be Long Now", I got misty-eyed. In November of 2008, I found a magazine on a train with Lin-Manuel Miranda on the cover and a story all about how he conceived and put together the show. He is amazingly talented as a writer, director AND actor (he played Usnavi in the Original Broadway Cast). Of course, I developed a crush on him that could only be usurped by Adam Lambert the following year. :)

With Mandy Gonzalez (Nina in the OBC)

In March of 2009, my husband and I got to see "In the Heights" on Broadway for our anniversary. The show was even more amazing than I expected. I loved how the story came together between the songs and all the dancing. There was so much "life" on stage! We were especially excited that Shaun Taylor-Corbett, an actor from our sons' favorite show ("Hi-5"), was in it and that he got to play the Piragua guy. I got the same feeling I did when I first saw "Rent," that I was reuniting with old friends. By the end of the show, I had tears streaming down my face. Afterward, we got to meet and take pictures with the actors and actresses by the stage door. We, of course, had to wait till Shaun came out to tell him that our kids were huge fans of his. :) He was very nice about it and didn't get embarrassed at all. I'm happy for him that he gets to play Sonny in the touring cast. Another cool personality was Robin DeJesus. I had previously seen him in the movie "Camp" and shared that fact. He was very friendly and modest.

With Robin DeJesus (Sonny in the OBC)

With Shaun Taylor-Corbett from Hi-5

What I also love about "In the Heights" is that, similar to "Rent", it does not just focus on one main character. Each character in the story has dreams and goals of their own. Most of them get their own song to share about it. One that stands out in particular is "Paciencia y Fe," sung by Abuela Claudia. It's about her life growing up and her move to America and all her dreams since then. I love the concept of patience and faith coming together (which is why I was able to get the tickets to see the show in the first place). I really liked Daniela and the comic relief she added to the show. She had such snappy lines and a fun attitude. Her friend Carla was fun too.

With Andrea Burns (Daniela in the OBC)

Overall, I love the concept of families wanting to make good lives for each other. It’s so poignant and definitely a driving force behind why we are where we live today. I hope I can see “In the Heights” again sometime and I encourage all readers to do the same, whether it is playing in a town near you or you have to go to Broadway (which is an experience that even takes “In the Heights” to new heights).

"One of my favorite parts"

My BFF recently wrote a blog about how someone told her that she was “one of their favorite parts” about the place where they both work. Then she e-mailed me to tell me that our e-mails to each other were “one of her favorite parts” of her day. At the end of the blog, she encouraged readers to tell at least one person in their life that they are "one of their favorite parts."

I already let my BFF know that I totally agree about our e-mail communication and how I had a fun time chatting with her via Gmail the other night. I told her that if we chatted that way every night, I’d NEVER go to bed! :) We’ve done Skype before and need to get back to that when my husband doesn’t need to be attached to his computer all night.

Therefore, I wanted to talk about someone who is “one of my favorite parts” about living in Maryland. Keep in mind that I really like all my friends and neighbors in this community and around the area. However, this particular friend stands out and comes to mind when asked to pick a person to tell. She is a friend who is also a neighbor.

After a busy day and long drive to move to our new neighborhood, this neighbor was the first friendly face who presented herself at our front door as we pulled up to our house. She invited us over anytime we needed to get out of the house with the kids that week. We saw her at least once a day during the first few weeks after our move. Our kids became friends quickly and we connected easily, as well. She told us all the good places to shop in the area and even spent the time to write out directions to each store.

As the months flew by, our friendship strengthened as we got to know each other better. When I hurt my eye in November, she drove me to the eye doctor and waited nearby to pick me up. She also helped with getting my younger son to school the next day. (Some other friends and neighbors also helped with this immensely and I want them to receive credit for it, as well.)

When I got my job, she had no problem with watching my older son every morning and helping him catch his bus. She greets him with a smile no matter how tired she is and he enjoys being there with her and her kids. She’s also been available to help watch either kid whenever I needed her assistance. In the past six months, she has totally defined everything a good neighbor should be, and more. (Not saying any of my neighbors now or in the past have not been good because some have been wonderful, as well….but she takes it to a whole new level.) I also have a great time hanging out with her, as she has come over to play board games, watch TV, bake challah or just simply chat. Our families sometimes do potluck Shabbat meals together. She introduced me to my favorite thrift store and we braved the crowds together during the Martin Luther King Day sale. Her husband is very nice too and I also enjoy talking to him. He tapes “American Idol” for me whenever I need it (since our VCR is not hooked up to record shows yet). He’s also helped watch the kids from time to time.

I hope I have been a good neighbor to her in return. I know things get busy on my end, but I try to do what I can. I enjoy bringing over little gifts for her kids, letting her borrow stuff from us, picking up things for her at the store, inviting (her and) her family over for meals, etc. I don’t do it because I feel I have to. I do it because I love having her (and her family) as a neighbor, and more importantly as a friend.

With that said, I ask and encourage you to tell at least one person in your life that they are "one of your favorite parts." You will be amazed what a difference it can make!

Vacation, all I ever wanted....

I was looking at old photographs the other day and they brought up a lot of good memories. I'm going to use this blog to write about various memories from my youth, from time to time. This first memory entry is devoted to family vacations.

The first family vacation I personally remember is when we drove to Florida the summer I turned 5. Our babysitter came along so that my parents could have some time to go out by themselves at night. (And now I understand why that is so important!) The one thing I remember from that trip was going to Circus World and having my face painted to look like a clown. I went around the room talking to the ladies who were applying the make-up. I wasn't shy at all. :)

A couple of years later, we went to Florida again, this time with my maternal grandma. It was my first trip on an airplane. I enjoyed the experience. I know we went to Disney World and back to Circus World.

On one or both of those trips, we visited family friends who lived in Tampa at the time. They had an indoor pool connected to their house. I still remember us all sitting on their couch with our wet hair to take a picture together. Recently, I found them on Facebook and we reconnected that way. :)

When we were a little older, our parents got a timeshare in Pompano Beach and we'd spend part or all of our winter break there. (Some trips we spent part of the time in Orlando.) Some family friends (all with kids the same age as us) would also partake in this timeshare and we'd hang out together at the pool or beach and for meals in the evening. When my friends and I reached babysitting age, our parents would let us all stay in one condo with our younger siblings while they went out. At least once on each trip, we'd go to a flea market and my mom would get us neon socks, Cabbage Patch Kid shirts, and chotchkies for us to take to school. Some classic restaurants we had to go to each year were Po' Folks (great fried chicken and soda in Mason jars) and The Flaming Pit (where all the Jewish people went on Christmas). Sometimes we'd go to the movies together, if the weather wasn't cooperating. We'd all celebrate New Year's Eve together and found it cool that the ball dropped at the actual time (coming from the midwest, that was a huge deal when we were kids). We had some funny and crazy experiences with our friends that made for some interesting vacation stories. One involved ordering a lot of fast food so that all the kids could get the toys the restaurant was promoting.

Eventually, we stopped using the timeshare in Florida. One summer when I was in high school, my parents got one in Lake of the Ozarks, MO and we spent a 4th of July weekend there. We even found a Po' Folks along the way! My grandma came with us for that trip, which was nice. When we arrived, there was a sign that said "Welcome Seniors!" I think it was for college seniors, but my grandma thought it was for her. :) I also remember doing a scavenger hunt at an outlet mall that I would have found boring otherwise. We went on a pontoon boat at one point, as well.

There were a few summers when we went to Barefoot Bay in Elkhart Lake, WI for a weekend. I liked that resort. It was easy to walk around there independently and they had a lot of activities for different age groups. There was a beach attached to the resort and they offered a lot of fun water activities, such as tubing. There was a huge dining hall where everyone ate all three meals. They had the best biscuits at dinner. Someone at our table usually ended up spilling a drink. And there was inevitably a server who managed to break a few glasses, causing the entire dining hall to erupt in applause.

When my sister and I were in college, we went on cruises with our parents. Those were enjoyable, as well. We met some friends on each cruise and hung out with them while our parents did their own thing. We all went on excursions together and ate meals together. On the second cruise, we had such a big group we wanted to eat with that they stuck us in a separate room where we had more privacy to dine with our friends. I would make mention of my favorite cruise experience ever, but it didn't really involve my sister being there, even though it did involve two families coming together for a special reason. ;)

Overall, I have a lot of fond memories of family vacations and I hope to be able to take our kids on vacations like that in the future. I can't wait to help them make memories of fun family trips.

Challah back girl

When my husband and I were first dating and even for a while when we were married, he was the primary challah baker. I know that is non-typical, but he did such a good job that I just let him do it. We had a bread machine and he had a great recipe to go with it.
In early 2005, I became pregnant with my first son and decided to take over the challah making responsibilities around that time. I followed the bread machine recipe my husband gave me and it was foolproof. Delicious challot every time.
Around Pesach of 2008, I managed to lose the paddle of the bread machine while cleaning for the holiday. Afterward, I sought out challah recipes that could be made by hand. I received a few and ended up going for one my friend gave me from her chef school. After a few trial runs, I modified the recipe to my liking and it came out even better. I used the Kitchen Aid mixer with the dough hook at this time. I also decided to switch to whole wheat flour in early 2009. I was making the challah this way for a while and had a lot of success with it.
This past November, I attended an event at our local Chabad called "Loaves of Love." It was in honor of Rivkie Holtzberg, the Rebbetzin who was tragically killed by terrorists in Mumbai. She used to make challot for everyone in the community or whoever needed it for Shabbos. The program allowed everyone involved to make challah for themselves and for a friend, neighbor, colleague, etc. (I gave ours to a close friend who is also our neighbor.) There was a raffle at the event and yours truly won a huge bowl with challah ingredients and an apron inside.
The next time I baked challah after that event, I started using the bowl and kneading the dough completely by hand. I can't imagine making challah the electronic way ever again. It's so satisfying to knead the dough with the strength of my arms and my love for Judaism and Shabbos. Sometimes I let my son help mix the ingredients. He enjoys it too.
I've mentioned before (perhaps more indirectly) how the "Loaves of Love" event got my mom interested in challah baking. Recently, she had over some family members and friends to do a challah baking party on Super Bowl Sunday. They took pictures and sent them to me. My 9 year-old cousin was one of the bakers and it looked like she was having a fantastic time. I got verklempt from looking at the pictures because it was so special to see women coming together to bake challah. I hope I can take part in that the next time I'm in Chicago. I'd also love to have my mom help me bake challah the next time she's here for a visit. It's such a beautiful experience every time. And the results are always delicious!

Judgment day

I was reading an article in "People" magazine about women who were secretly alcoholics because they felt it made them more secure about being mothers. One woman even said that she drank because she felt all the other mothers she knew were better than she was. I also saw this note on PassiveAggressiveNotes.com. Both items brought me back to when I read "Goodnight Nobody" by Jennifer Weiner. It started off by sharing the insecurities of a mother based on her thought that the other mothers she saw in the park had it more together than she did. It probably wasn't the best choice for me to read as a brand new mother, but it also affirmed to me that I shouldn't have to feel so insecure in my own parenting.

There are about a million parenting books, manuals, websites, articles, etc. about how to raise your kids the best way possible. I enjoy reading parenting magazines but I don't obsess over what the articles say. How did parents get by in raising their kids before the information era came around? I find it all completely overwhelming and choose to learn through experience. I went to a parenting seminar and found some information helpful, but other information was just swimming out there in space (as in, "I will never retain this or even need to use this in my parenting habits"). I got laughed at by the teacher for giving my toddler choices. Has he ever met my toddler? No!

I know that I have some shortcomings in the parenting department, but I don't expect to be perfect. I need to be firm without having to yell to get my point across. I usually end up as the "mean parent" (so I can relate to Lynnette on "Desperate Housewives"). I could have a little more patience too. However, this is for me to figure out....not the leader of a parenting seminar, not my parents or in-laws, not my friends, and certainly not strangers! One of my pet peeves is when my child is throwing a tantrum at a store and someone comes up to them to try to resolve the tantrum and look like some sort of hero. It undermines me as a parent and just gets on that one nerve that the tantrum didn't completely destroy already.

I don't tell other people how to raise their kids. I may not agree with every choice, but it's not my place to judge or show some expression of judgment. If someone wants advice, I'm glad to share what worked for me, but I don't expect it to work for everyone. All kids are different and I respect that. I just hope other people can afford to share the same respect. All I know is that the mom who looks like she has it all together may just be showing a facade. Kids are unpredictable and no parenting expert will have all the answers all the time. Everything has to be learned by experience. The true test of a "good" parent is being able to laugh off a tough day and still look forward to seeing your kids when they wake up the next morning. My kids have their moments, but I do feel like I must be doing at least something right. I just need to figure out what that is and keep doing it.

I know I promised that this blog would not be about my kids. Technically, this entry was more about me as a parent and my own convictions. I wasn't using it to brag about my kids or even share stories about them. I just wanted to clarify that fact. :)

A mix of sticks

This is my progress over the past week. Most of it was done at the hospital while waiting for my older son to go into and then come out of surgery. The rest was done during "American Idol" (the first episode this week was 2 hours long). Both episodes of "American Idol" will be 2 hours long next week, so I expect to get a lot more done!
I got new needles this week. This time they are made of bamboo. I still feel way more comfortable knitting with separate needles vs. using an attached set. I also like the longer needles better. They feel more comfortable in my hands.
Finally, I joined ravelry.com thanks to some peer pressure. I am eema2boys. Come say hi and add me as a friend. :) I don't know how active I'll be, but it's worth a try. I've been told that it's easy for new knitters to follow along.

All in Hashem's Plan

I have a few friends who knit and blog and we've decided to embark on a blog project that has nothing to do with knitting. We're going to take turns coming up with a topic every Thursday and we each have to blog about it by the end of that day and post links to each other's blogs so that people can see our different perspectives on the same topic.
Here are the other blogs:
Froggie Knits Like Crazy
Charmingly Random
Desperate Madness

This week's topic comes from Froggie:
I've been hearing a lot lately that G-d has a plan for everyone's life and that you just have to trust that though what you are going through today is not great it will get you to where you should be going. Write about a time that seemed like it was leading nowhere, but took you to your next destination in life.

Here goes:
I had been living in the Chicago suburbs for over 30 years (except when I was living downstate for college), when all of that changed on our 3 year anniversary. My husband called me to tell me that he got a job in New Jersey and that we'd have a month to move there. We had thought about moving to that area to live closer to his family, but I also thought we'd have more time to plan for it. I wasn't clamoring to move there and told my husband that the only way I'd do it is if he found a way to get us there. And so he did. Then we had to sell our townhouse (which was successful and probably wouldn't have been that way when the real estate market had trouble a little while later) and find a place to live in NJ. I found a shul in northern NJ that was Modern Orthodox and had a ton of young families. And they were even renting out a house next door to prospective members. All things seemed to fit into place in that respect. It was very hard for me to move away from family and friends and I appreciate the support they gave me when all tears were shed and everything else was said and done. I'm thankful that most of them haven't de-invested in our friendship and I enjoy seeing them when we visit Chicago (and would love to have them visit us here too).

And then came the big move....
When we first got there, I had this impending feeling of dread just from walking around the downtown suburban area. However, I was determined to stick it out and make the best of things. Our first Shabbos there was hectic, but I made the effort to meet new people, despite the crowdedness from the Bar Mitzvah going on and my older son having a series of tantrums. I even made a new friend that day and we connected up a week or so later. Our kids were very close in age and adored each other. That was a bright spot in an otherwise stressful move.

To sum things up from that point on, we were driven by various factors to realize that where we were trying to establish ourselves into a community was not where we were meant to be for the long term. It started with a new shul president taking over and trying to push us out of our lease before we even had a new place to move into. It was a catalyst that helped us realize where we fit in (or didn't fit in) to the community. Thankfully, we had some nice friends who were very supportive. There were also issues with the job that helped my husband get us out there in the first place and then the second job he got afterward. It took him only a month to find the job he'd stay at for almost 2 years though. This job was definitely part of Hashem's grand plan.... In the meantime, I had a terrible time finding a job and didn't even know where I fit in to the career world at that point. I thought I had landed one job but then it was taken back when they realized I was Shomer Shabbos/Yom Tov. And while we had made some great friends, schedules were conflicting often and we didn't get to spend as much time with them as we'd like. We did have a playgroup going on for a while, but the play dates became less frequent after my younger son was born. There were also times when we felt invisible altogether. Throughout all this, we decided to check out different Modern Orthodox communities throughout the northern NJ area to see if there was any area that might be a better fit for us.

In the meantime, I started a new job in February 2008 and my younger son was born a month later. The following month, some friends of ours from shul moved next door to us. As a result, we became much closer with them. We settled into a routine, going to our shul for the most part and still shul shopping on the side every now and then. We gave up shopping after our older son turned 3 in September and decided to wait until the new year.

In November 2008, everything changed for us, in a good way. My husband had a work conference in Silver Spring, MD. It was close to DC, so the boys and I tagged along and got to do some sightseeing and visit old friends I hadn't seen in a long time. The moment we stepped out of the Metro and into the capitol, I fell in love. I couldn't get over how perfect DC felt. We were living close to NYC at the time and my husband was working in the city, so he definitely got a different feel from DC in comparison. That week, we started talking about checking out communities in the DC area. My husband's brother pointed us to Silver Spring and his chavrusa had a friend who used to live there and connected us to someone in a Modern Orthodox community.

A year ago (as of this weekend), we spent our first Shabbos in Silver Spring and attended the Bar Mitzvah of a boy with Down Syndrome. The whole experience was incredible (the Bar Mitzvah itself, the friendliness of everyone at shul, the hospitality of people in the community, etc.). We decided to visit again in the spring to make sure this was what we wanted. After an even more incredible weekend of meeting people and getting a feel for the community, we were sold. A few weeks later, we put a contract on a house and here we are now.

The hardest people to move away from this time were my mother-in-law, our friends (or the people we actually stayed close with throughout the entire 2 years in NJ...especially our next door neighbors), my bosses and my older son's school. We didn't feel bad about leaving the shul as that was our intention for a while anyway. A few weeks after we put the contract on the house, we found out that the Rabbi from our shul in NJ was moving away too. That helped us realize even more that our decision was a good one (not that we didn't know it already). The other affirmation of our decision came from my older son's teacher in NJ. She told us that the county we were moving to was the best place for people with hearing loss. (We also were told that the ENT who performed his implant surgery yesterday is one of the best in the entire country.)

I've mentioned in other blogs how much I love living here. I could reiterate it over and over again. We connected with a family whose son also has hearing loss (and has already been through the cochlear implant process) and they offered to bring us pizza after our older son's CI surgery this week. That is just a small highlight of how great people are in this community. We have fabulous neighbors who all came together last week during the blizzard (and friends who decided to have a pot luck lunch when I hurt my eye and couldn't get a Shabbos meal together like I had planned). I am actually disappointed when I can't make it to shul for weather (or lack of eruv) reasons. We have family nearby in Baltimore, as well as cousins in Virginia. We also have friends nearby who don't live in our neighborhood but are close enough to get together with at other times. This move has definitely enhanced our social life. :) (A huge change from me crying every night over having a hard time fitting into our community in NJ...which I felt better about once we became closer with our next door neighbors.)

Overall, if we hadn't moved to NJ in the first place, we wouldn't have been able to establish ourselves as Modern Orthodox and my husband wouldn't have had the job that sent us to DC in the first place. I feel this was all in Hashem's plan. That as rough and shaky as things were for us at times in NJ, we found where we were meant to be all along...in MD. We still miss family and friends who live far away, but we know they are happy that we're happy in our new home and community. We hope everyone can come visit us, and we still wouldn't mind having our family and friends move even closer. I'm sure if that is meant to be, it will happen when the time is right, as well. ;)

One show....glory

A little over 13 years ago, I was introduced to a new, modern musical take on “La Boheme.” It was called “Rent,” and it was all about people living in NY with very little money, drug addictions, HIV/AIDS, etc. Not your typical musical, right? However, it won a Tony for Best Musical in 1996 and I received the Original Broadway Cast recording for Hanukkah later that year. At first, it took a while to get used to the songs and dialogue. Then one day I just started catching on to the music and story and was hooked. I hadn’t even seen it yet and I felt I knew the characters just through the songs. I checked out the story and pieces started falling into place, helping the songs make that much more sense. A year after I first received this fabulous CD, I got to see it on stage for the first time when it came to Chicago. I immediately fell in love with it. Knowing the story and characters helped me feel even more connected and I felt like I was visiting old friends by the time I got to see it performed live. I even cried during some parts of the second act.
A few months later, my sister and I were home on spring break and we got stuck home in a major snowstorm. (March in Chicago, go figure!) We were determined to wait all day for front row seats (and we had plans to meet a friend in the city for that purpose too), and so we dug the car out of several feet of snow and took the Metra downtown the next day. Then we waited outside all day in the freezing cold for our chance to get front row seats for $20 a person. People were nice and brought us food and later the theater manager let us sit inside. The line didn’t really start forming till later and we were right in front. The show was even more amazing the second time around and we got to meet the cast and take pictures afterward. It was such an awesome day!
After that, I saw “Rent” six more times, including twice in one week.
In July 2001, I got to meet and take a picture with Adam Pascal when he was performing in “Aida” on Broadway. That moment ranked up there with the day I waited outside for tickets.
When the movie version came out, I had to go out and see it on the first day. I wasn’t as thrilled with how they changed songs into short bits of dialogue, but it was cool to see some of the main actors. I recently saw the movie version of the final Broadway performance. It was cool to see the scenes from different angles than I would normally see while sitting down in the audience. It was also nice to see it as a movie with all the songs intact.
“Last night, I had a dream….I found myself in a desert called Cyberland….” Just kidding, but I actually had a dream last night about seeing “Rent” with Anthony Rapp and Adam Pascal in it. I didn’t get to see them on tour (my sister did though), but I’m sure that must have been amazing. I’m glad I met Adam in person, in any case. I heard he wasn’t really coming out to meet people at the tour shows, but I could be mistaken.
I think I’ll always be a “Rent”-aholic at heart. I can still listen to the CD and sing along. I still like quoting the songs in other aspects of life. I still like reading articles and seeing videos online about it. I may like other musicals that are being performed today or in the past, but nothing will ever come close to finding the glory I’ve found in “Rent.”


The day we waited out in the cold for front row seats, March 1998



Meeting Adam Pascal, July 2001

Sparks ignite when I read his books

This author blog is about Nicholas Sparks. I was first introduced to him when I saw "Message in a Bottle" over 10 years ago. I thought it was a good movie, but never read the book (due to my thing against reading the book after seeing the movie). Then I read "The Notebook" later that year and was hooked. A few months later, I read "A Walk to Remember" and loved everything about it. I was so disappointed by how the movie changed around the feel of the story. It was written to take place during a simpler time. It didn't work in the 90's and I felt it was only there to glorify Mandy Moore's voice (as beautiful as it is, and as much as I liked "Only Hope").
Later on, I read "A Bend in the Road," "The Rescue," and "Nights in Rodanthe" all within a short time period. As of now, I've read all his books except "Message..." and "Three Weeks with my Brother" (which I own now). As for the latter, I find it cool that he has a brother named Micah since my younger son is named Micah. :) And a girl I met at his book signing told me I'd really like it.
I've met him at two book signings. I forgot to bring a camera to the first one (in Illinois), but still got his autograph in "True Believer." That was in April of 2005. I met him again this past September in Virginia. I got a picture and his autograph in "The Last Song" this time. I also made a new friend during that signing. (The girl who recommended "Three Weeks...", as she was in line behind me and upset that she forgot her camera, so I offered to take a picture with my camera and e-mail it to her. We ended up talking through most of our wait in the long line.)
In addition to "A Walk...," I've seen the other movies made of his books (I loved "The Notebook" and still cry thinking about it) and am excited to see "Dear John" and "The Last Song" when I get a chance.
If someone were to ask which of his books is my favorite, I'd definitely have to go with "The Rescue." I also loved "The Last Song" and "A Walk to Remember." All his books have been interesting and captivating and I hope he'll write sequels to some more of them or bring back characters into other books. I eagerly await his next book, whatever and whenever that may be.

My most unexpected friendship

I have a few friends who knit and blog and we've decided to embark on a blog project that has nothing to do with knitting. We're going to take turns coming up with a topic every Thursday and we each have to blog about it by the end of that day and post links to each other's blogs so that people can see our different perspectives on the same topic.
Here are the other blogs:
Froggie Knits Like Crazy
Charmingly Random
Desperate Madness

The first topic, which I chose, is "My most unexpected friendship." This has nothing to do with the method in which we made friends, but more about the nature of the friendship itself or about the people involved.

Here goes:
I have had several jobs over the last 10 years. At all jobs, my boss was truly my superior and a role I had to work under and respect. I've gotten along with some bosses and just tolerated others till I could find something better or until the job ended altogether. I got along really well with one manager at a past job and we'd have "tea talks" every morning, but he wasn't directly my superior, so it doesn't count the same way.

When I was living in NJ, I was hired for a job doing part-time medical billing for a privately owned company. It was a new field for me, but I just needed strong typing skills and an eye for detail. My bosses were a husband and wife team that owned the company. I originally thought I'd just be working for the husband and had the most interaction with him for a while. He was very nice, but we mainly talked about work-related stuff. I had limited work interaction with the wife when I started out, but I'd see her at the end of my training shift and we'd talk when we had the chance. She and I were both due with our babies around the same time, so we had that common bond. The couple was Orthodox, so we also had some things in common on that end. (I'm Modern Orthodox, so there were some things I did on a more secular level, but we still could relate on a lot of topics.) As I continued to work for them, I'd come by to drop off papers (I was doing most of the work from home) and would end up chatting with the wife for an hour or so. Eventually, I brought my kids over to play with their kids. Especially since our babies were 2 weeks apart. During the first summer that I worked for them, they invited us for a Shabbos meal while we were checking out their neighborhood as a potential community for us to settle into. My husband had a lot to talk about with my male boss and our kids enjoyed playing together.

Early last year, I decided to take on some more responsibilities with my job, which required me to work at their house once a week. I enjoyed this time because I could do my work and talk with the wife the whole time, when she wasn't on phone calls.

The whole job overall was a great arrangement in terms of flexibility. We'd also get gifts for each others' kids on birthdays and holidays and gave each other shalach manot last year for Purim. Nothing was expected on either end, but we enjoyed being able to share in such special occasions and holidays.

When we decided officially to move to MD, telling my bosses was one of the hardest things ever, harder than telling my friends and acquaintances or even my older son's teachers. This was because I enjoyed working for them and I had formed such a special connection with the wife. I gave them plenty of time to find someone new before I left and even helped them look for new employees on my own time. I still stay in touch with the wife and we share the latest news in our lives and in our families' lives. When I was going through the hiring process for my new job, she gave them an amazing referral that completely sealed the deal. She even shared with me what she told them and it was incredibly sweet. We had a great professional relationship aside from our friendship. Both she and her husband trusted me and it motivated me to do my best. I hope we'll continue to stay in touch, as this is a special friendship that I still cherish. I also hope that anyone who works for them currently or in the future will realize how wonderful their bosses are and will want to work as diligently as I did to continue to help their business thrive.

The reason this friendship is unexpected is because I never expected to be close friends with anyone I worked for and I am very happy that this is the opportunity I had to establish such a friendship.

My on-again, off-again week of knitting

I made some good progress over the snowy weekend. Then I managed to drop one of my needles Sunday night. When I went back to look for it, I found it with my foot and the crack it made underneath. I thought I could tape the needle together, but it felt wobbly. Then I tried using super glue, but that made things worse and it cracked even more. I contacted my friend who owns the yarn store to see if she could bring home a new set and I'd pay her back. In the midst of the chaotic weather situation, it slipped her mind, but she loaned me a circular set in the meantime. It's interesting to use. I don't mind borrowing it, but I don't know that I'm ready to purchase such a set for myself yet. My friend thinks I'll be spoiled by this set, but I still have a longing for the ones I've been using up till this point. My knitting has gotten a little sloppy with the circular set. I totally appreciate that she loaned it to me so I could continue on this scarf, but I'm glad it's just a loan for now. And call me crazy, but I hiked to her house in the snow last night, just so I could get going on the scarf again while watching "American Idol." That's usually my main knitting time!
I'm sure my BFF will find this blog hilarious, but that's okay. I'm happy to have picked up a new skill this year and even happier that someone wanted me to teach them before knowing how inexperienced I am. I definitely gave her the Facebook link to my friend's store. I now want to share this Facebook link with my loyal readers and anyone else who comes across this, lives in Maryland and is interested in knitting: The Yarn Spot. Even if you don't live in Maryland, definitely check it out!

Put on a happy face

Through a friend from our community, I was recently introduced to "The Happiness Project". It is a blog that recently became a book. The author is our friend's client. Recently, she spoke at B&N in DC about her book and stated the top 5 ways to make yourself happy. This was filmed and broadcast on Fox News here. I watched the video today and wrote down the Top 5 list for myself, to measure my own level of happiness against it.

5. Shed the clutter in your life: I recently blogged about how I am a hoarder and how I am working to give away stuff I don't need. One of my close friends e-mailed me in regards to that and said that not having clutter around was making her happier. I definitely agree. I like giving stuff to people if I feel it would be more useful to them than to myself. Today, I gave a friend some tablecloths that would fit her table better than ours. She was happy to have them and they will get to be used again, instead of crammed in our buffet cabinet.

4. Be a good and reliable friend: I also recently blogged about this. I realize that I am not perfect about always staying in touch with people and something today made me realize that I am missing out on things in that respect. I sometimes focus all my energy on one set of friends and then get to the others when I have time. I should be more attentive to my friends no matter how much I see or hear from them. In the long run, my friends know I love and care about them and they know where to find me if they want to catch up. The friendship still works both ways. I'm doing the best I can, given how many balls I have in the air.

3. Learn something new: Knitting. Enough said! :) Oddly enough, a friend e-mailed me today to ask if I could teach her how to knit. I was honest about my knitting experience, or lack of, and pointed her in the right direction.

2. Get more sleep and exercise: As Elle Woods says: "Exercise gives you endorphins. Endorphins make you happy." I have gotten back to exercising this year. I've blogged about it a few times too. This week hasn't been as good for me on an exercising standpoint. I'm off my routine. However, I have been able to sleep in this week, thanks to my older son's inability to tell time (5 minutes stretches into 20 every time he asks). I plan to get back into my exercise routine when life gets back to normal again (in regards to the snow situation here). I did trudge through a thick tundra of snow the other day while carrying my younger son. That was a major workout! I also realize that I don't go to bed all that early. I need to get back into that routine. Knowing I can sleep in this week has caused me to stay up even later than normal. Every night feels like Saturday night!

1. Make your bed: I don't do this at all. It looks cozier when it's all unmade. I don't know why. I've NEVER been good about making my bed. My mom is probably reading this right now and laughing about it. When we have a cleaning service, they make the bed and it looks pretty, but more "model home" like. The other concept I thought of was "You made your bed, now lie in it." It could be coined as a phrase similar to "you dug your own grave" or anything that is a metaphor about making a mess for yourself and having to deal with it. However, it could be twisted in a good way...as in you created your own path or set your own life standards. I "made my bed" to be enjoyable and fun and now I want to participate in that fun and enjoyment. I'm not trying to sound cheesy. I think life is whatever you make of it. This applies to all individuals. There's a thing called "self-fulfilling prophecy," that could definitely apply to the concept of making your bed and lying in it.

Overall, I think I'm generally happy. I have my mood swings, but I can't complain overall. I am thankful for many things in my life and feel that I am finally in a good place overall. I have my own list of ways one can make themselves happy. While the list above makes complete sense, I have to wonder if these five concepts are anywhere on her list, as well:

5. Have something to look forward to, even if it's as simple as your favorite TV show coming on.
4. Laugh whenever possible. Find the humor in unlikely situations.
3. Eat lots of chocolate. (Okay, I'm biased here, but chocolate always makes me happy on the simplest of levels.)
2. Treat yourself to things, even if it doesn't cost anything (such as a bubble bath).
1. Love yourself. (Or at least like yourself enough to not be your own worst enemy and get to a point where you'll love yourself eventually.) No need to be conceited though.

This list was just the top 5 things that popped into my head and I feel they do matter on the path toward happiness.

So, as the Partridge Family says: "C'mon, get happy!"

Where the Heart ALWAYS is

I first connected with Billie Letts when I read "Where the Heart is." I even had dreams about being stranded in Wal-Mart long after I read that book. Then the movie came out the year after I read it. I liked it the first time and then fell in love with it the second time. I felt it totally surpassed the excellence of the book. It's still my number one favorite movie.
After WTHI, she came out with "The Honk and Holler Opening Soon." I thought the title sounded strange so I overlooked it. However, I went right for "Shoot the Moon" when it came out a few years later. I really liked it and shared it with friends afterward. In 2008, I read "Made in the U.S.A.," which was impossible to put down. It was a dark story, but so well written that I knew it would leave me smiling somehow. Then my mom told me that I'd love "The Honk and Holler..." so I finally gave it a chance and was not disappointed at all. It was such a good and moving story that I was sorry I didn't read it sooner. I hope Billie Letts will continue to write more winners as wonderful as these past four have been.

No more kaynehores! (Part Two)

Before we moved out here, everyone told us that it rarely ever snows in Maryland and if it does, they get just an inch and schools close because they don't know how to handle that much snow. That being the gist of things, we didn't make an effort to buy new boots for the kids (thankfully the ones they have still fit). We had a shovel and a huge bag of salt locked away in our storage shed, thinking we'd never need them. Then we got dumped on in mid-December, during a weekend we had a friend visiting from Chicago. I figured this wasn't anything new for her, but it was annoying that we couldn't take her downtown before she had to head back. After that huge storm, you'd think the affected communities would get a wake-up call about how to prepare for such situations. However, that was not the case, aside from closing schools for longer than necessary. I guess everyone thought that would be the last of the snow. However, we got even more dumped on this weekend. It's like being in a snow tundra! There are people naming this "blizzard" all over Facebook. I have to wonder if we got the kaynehore for making fun of all the snow in Chicago or for letting people tell us that it didn't snow much here and clinging to that belief. In any case, while it's an annoying inconvenience, it hasn't sent us running to Miami and we got to bond with our next door neighbors a lot this Shabbos (and afterward too). There's now a path between our kitchen door and their laundry room door for easy access between houses. :)

My grandma has a doppelganger!!!

There was "doppelganger" week on Facebook recently, where we could post our celebrity look-alike. (Mine was Jennifer Grey, pre-face lift.) I thought about doppelgangers again tonight, when I was watching "Casablanca" and noticing how closely Ingrid Bergman resembles my paternal grandma when she was younger (which would have been around that same time). It's really uncanny and I couldn't stop thinking about it the entire time I watched the movie. I even told my neighbor about it (since he brought over the movie in the first place). Then I was telling him how my late paternal grandpa looked like Nicolas Cage when he was younger and my late maternal grandma looked like Madonna did at the beginning of "Evita" when she was younger. I just based this all off pictures I've seen of them.

Get your Bosco at Jewel-Osco

A lot of you might not know this about me unless you knew me back in 2001. During my post college single girl days, I decided to take improv comedy classes. I've always loved theater and thought it would be a fun way to express myself. It started when I went to a couple of Comedy Sportz shows. They offered improv classes and I thought it sounded fun. So...I started out in early spring with a beginner's class. I went into it being all giggly about the concept of having to make up something on the spot. Then I got really comfortable with it. At the end of the 8 week class, we got to put on a show for family and friends. It was a LOT of fun! I loved the class so much that I decided to take it again that summer and fall.

The second week of my summer class, I had lost my voice but still decided to go because I hated to miss out! There was an activity to make up advertising slogans about a product of the "audience's" choosing (this audience was mainly the teacher). So they chose Bosco and in my "Marge Simpson" voice, I went with "Get your Bosco at Jewel-Osco!" The "audience" loved it and that made me feel strangely confident for some reason. I had a lot of fun during the summer session and at the class show, I got to witness a marriage proposal. It was to one of the girls in the class and her soon-to-be-fiancé got on stage and did it in front of the whole audience. I only knew the girl through class, but I thought she was really nice and I knew how much she wanted to marry her boyfriend. Anyway, I got so emotional about watching that proposal take place. Maybe because it was my first in-person proposal and it had such a "chick flick" feel to it. I still get verklempt when I think about it.

The fall class got to explore some games that they did in the professional shows. My favorite was "da doo run run." It was based on that same oldies song and people would have to make up rhymes based on someone's name. There were a few catches to the game though. I just knew I was good at it, as I would practice with one of my friends over the summer (after we saw it together during a show). However, my group didn't get to do it for the final show. I would have loved to though. The fall class experience was interesting for me in a few ways. I got to pay for it by ushering at weekend shows (back when I wasn't observing Shabbos and would go to the city every Friday and Saturday regardless) and would also hang out with people from the class after the class had ended for the evening. They got to know me in a different light and that prompted me to make some decisions about my life when I went to Israel that winter. After the fall classes were done and we performed our show, I slipped away from the Comedy Sportz scene a little bit. However, I thought I would audition for the troupe that February.

Side note: I put a note in the Western Wall regarding changing some of my single girl habits if I could either have a really good love relationship or become part of the Comedy Sportz troupe. Needless to say, I am not performing right now and I married an amazing man!

After the audition, I went to the show every so often (such as for shows my friend was in or if I was in the city anyway) and eventually didn't make it there anymore until my bachelorette party in 2004. Oddly enough, my spring and summer teachers were in that show and I got to go up on stage and perform with them. It was nice to see them again and it was kind of a "Where are they Now" thing for them (about me). I did see my spring teacher in another show the first summer I was dating my husband and we still talk about one of the funny things he did in that show. I talk to my summer teacher via facebook sometimes. I haven't seen or heard from my fall teacher since, but I didn't really have the same connection with her as I did with my spring and summer teachers. She was nice though.

Overall, I have fond memories of my year of Comedy Sportz classes and all the interesting people I met that way. They stay with me almost 9 years later!

Making progress

I got a lot of knitting done this week while catching up on "American Idol." I can definitely see that it has gotten bigger since a few weeks ago. I'm starting to get more comfortable in the process and not hitting snags like before. My older son is very excited that I am making this for him! I find it relaxing overall, but still feel overwhelmed about all the knitting options available these days. It makes my head spin to even think about it. So I'll just keep knitting, just keep knitting... (Think of Dori when you read this last line.)

No more kaynehores!

I grew up with a grandmother who was fluent in Yiddish. If she didn't want me to know what she was talking about, she would speak to my mom in Yiddish and say words like "meshuganneh" and "kaynehore." I thought that kaynehore was a swear word and used it while playing Barbies. I later found out that it meant "it shouldn't happen to you." Years down the road, I was watching "Will and Grace" and Grace said something about not giving herself a kaynehore. That's pretty much the same as not jinxing yourself.
I am proud to say that I have never broken a bone in my 33 years of life. However, I've given myself a kaynehore by saying so, as I've gotten myself into stupid and embarrassing accidents instead. In college, I managed to sit on a letter opener one year and burn my hand on hot pans the next. I think I was okay otherwise. And I've been fine up until we moved here....
Then the week we moved, I managed to step on a piece of glass (while wearing a slipper, mind you) and slice through the bottom of my foot. I didn't go to the ER though. I just kept pressure on it and now I can't even tell which foot was injured anymore.
In early November, on my way out to an interview (for the job I now have), I managed to bump into a shelf with my left eye. I actually considered going to the ER then, but my friend's dad said I should see an eye doctor instead. I did and my eye was taken care of and healed up in a couple of days. I had to wear an eye patch between doctor visits, but I didn't let it keep me from living my life (other than needing rides everywhere). I also learned that even with Lasik, I see better out of my left eye than my right. So that was a bit frustrating.
At the end of November, I was trying to open a wine bottle (of one of my favorite wines) with a cheap corkscrew and managed to break the top of the bottle and slice my hand in two spots. Thankfully, my mother-in-law and stepfather-in-law were here and were very helpful. They wanted me to go to the ER but I insisted that just keeping pressure on it would make it heal. They were impressed with my barely visible scars the following week!
This past weekend, I slipped on some snow and fell on the pavement underneath. It hurt by my left hip area but I iced it and was fine....until last night. I finally decided that something was worth going to the ER for when I had a major muscle spasm in my back. At first I thought it was in my chest and that I was having a heart attack. Then I thought it was a slipped disk or that one of my lungs collapsed. It hurt that much to breathe. I wasn't taking chances at playing doctor to myself this time. My husband was smart enough to give me some ibuprofen and that helped soften the pain a little. However, it flared up again right before I was about to have an X-ray. I woke up this morning with a sore upper back and decided to take it easy for the day. I feel a lot better now, B"H. I don't plan to lift heavy objects or shovel the heavy snow we're expecting this weekend. It also puts a crimp in my exercise schedule. However, I can't complain too much and my BFF told me to look at the silver lining of being able to get in a lot of reading time at the ER and also getting a day to relax from my normally hectic schedule.
I just hope the season of kaynehores is now over and that I can get back to my regularly scheduled lifestyle. I think I paid my dues. (And I still have the scar from cutting my forehead when I fell on cement at age 1. I think I was owed no broken bones over that one!)

Bally Who?!?

Back in the day, I used to go to a fitness club to work out. For the most part, I belonged to Bally Total Fitness. There was a time when I had an X-Sport membership, but I didn’t renew it and went back to Bally afterward. X-Sport was beautiful and convenient, but expensive! And there was a creepy exercise bike guy there. :P Anyway, I enjoyed working out and went all the time. Then I got pregnant with my younger son and stopped going to the gym after a while, to the point where we ended up cancelling our membership because my husband had no time to go at all either. I then started walking around our neighborhood in NJ. There were sidewalks and I had a walkman for a while (yes, I am that old school). That helped keep me fit during my pregnancy. I even walked outside in the freezing cold. Eventually, I put on Denise Austin’s pregnancy workout video and moved along to cheesy 80’s songs. After my younger son was born and when I went back to my work-at-home job, I pretty much gave up on any exercise. I’d take him on occasional walks when it was nice out, but nothing like before. This past summer, my older son had some time off from school before we moved. I’d take him out for a bike ride (for him) and walk (for me) every day if it wasn’t swelteringly hot out. Then we moved and there was another family (in our new neighborhood) having a moving sale around that same time. She sold us a barely used treadmill in perfect condition, along with 2 lamps, for a really good price. Impossible to refuse! Once we got the new treadmill, I started working out again. I built up slowly to a good workout. Then I started my job and fell behind on working out. I’m just now starting to get back on the treadmill again. It feels nice to fit a workout into my routine. And I feel less guilty about the chocolate and other snacks I eat at work. :) The other two awesome things about working out at home are that I can listen to my music without needing headphones and I can wear whatever I want without anyone else caring. Another perk is that I don’t have to shower in a gross locker room where women are randomly sitting around in the buff.

It's all about the candy

There’s a term called “High Holiday Jew.” This applies to Jewish people who only attend shul twice a year, during the High Holy Days of Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur. I used to fall into this category during college and a little bit beyond. Then I went to Israel in 2002 and all that changed. Anyway, I’m not actually spring-boarding off this topic to talk about the steps I’ve taken in my path to become more observant. That will come another time. I am just wondering if there is a term for more observant Jewish people who celebrate non-Jewish (but not church-related) holidays. I’m not talking about the American holidays of Memorial Day, Independence Day, Labor Day or Thanksgiving. I’m referring to Halloween and Valentine’s Day. St. Patrick’s Day could fit in this category too, but I don’t follow that one at all. Could it be “Non-Jewish (but non-Church) holiday Jews”?
I wanted to touch on this topic because I have enjoyed celebrating both Halloween and Valentine’s Day my entire life. (Even when I wasn’t seeing someone during the latter.) I know there are things involved with both holidays that people who are even more observant than I am will not even fathom celebrating. However, I celebrate them for the surface things; the fun stuff I did as a kid and can do with my own kids. I love dressing my kids up to go trick-or-treating. I know that Purim is around the corner and that it still involves costumes and treats, but it’s different. I love carving a pumpkin and baking the seeds. I love that Halloween takes place during autumn, which is my favorite season. I love all the excitement my kids show for Halloween. We focus on the fun and silly things instead of the scary and macabre things. One of my friends throws the best Halloween parties, which I haven’t been able to attend since we moved away. I love seeing the pictures she takes of everyone in their clever costumes. I love the creative games and treats she has at these parties. I threw a Halloween party during the first year my husband and I were dating. It was a lot of fun and I still have my pictures and memories of that night. I went trick-or-treating or to Halloween parties with my friends in college. I’ve gone to “Rocky Horror” shows for Halloween on occasion. The movie fits best with that holiday. I’ve only had a couple of bad Halloweens, but it never ruined the holiday for me overall. This past Halloween, we couldn't go trick-or-treating because it was on Shabbos. However, we took the boys to a Halloween festival at an aviation museum. There were snacks, crafts, stories and a hayride. It was really cute. The boys still got to dress up too. I also stocked up on lots of costumes at the thrift store for both dress-up and Purim.
As for Valentine’s Day….I always liked making the pretty foil covered boxes to collect Valentine cards from my classmates. The candy is as much of a perk as it is on Halloween. If the conversation hearts were Kosher, I’d have them in my house. Somehow, a Hershey’s kiss wrapped in pink foil tastes that much sweeter. As I got older, I still enjoyed V-day even without a significant other to share it with (that didn’t happen till I was 18). I liked sending cards to family and friends. I enjoyed having a busy night at work (at my Chinese restaurant job in high school). I’d even get dressed in red and pink for school on V-day. Throughout college, my parents would send me fun V-day care packages with lots of chocolate. This was carried over from when they’d give me V-day presents as a kid. V-day was even a wake-up call for me one year. When I met my husband, we started dating around V-day and he brought me a card and rose on our first real date. Then he came over the night before V-day (he was going on a ski trip on the holiday and I had planned a girls’ night before I even knew he’d come into my life) and that’s when we had our first kiss. We went on fun and romantic dates every V-day. Our last real V-day date was the year I was pregnant with my older son. After that time, he joined us on our dates. This year, that is going to change and we’ll have our first V-day kids-free date since 2005! My older son is now aware of Valentine’s Day and excited to celebrate it at school. He’s always asking if it is V-day yet and then asking if it’s February yet, just in case he thinks he missed out on a holiday. I read him a story about it last night and I think he’s even more excited for it now.
I also like volunteering at my older son’s school for these holidays. I did it for Halloween and plan to for Valentine’s Day, as well. I love baking holiday-themed treats.
Before I became observant, I did actually like Christmas. (I never liked Easter though, since I couldn’t enjoy the candy due to Pesach.) That has changed for me though. However, nothing can change V-day or Halloween for me.

Missing

We’ve been living in our new home and community for almost 6 months. It feels like we’ve lived here forever. We’re just so comfortable and happy here! We love our house too. However, I’ve realized that no matter where you go, you can’t have it all. We moved to NJ from Illinois in 2007 and that was definitely a lifestyle change for us. Then we moved to MD from NJ just recently. While this was definitely a good move for us, there are some things I can acknowledge that I miss about NJ. I don’t think my 2 years there were a waste by any means and I probably am more negative about being there than I really should be. In lieu of that, here is a list of things I miss about living in NJ:

1. Not having to pump my own gas, especially in the winter! Somehow gas was cheaper as a result.
2. The friends we made whom we still stay in touch with and enjoy talking to (including friends in NY). We enjoyed seeing some of them when we came up for a visit in December.
3. Being close in proximity to my mother-in-law. However, we saw her 3 weeks in a row around Thanksgiving and Hanukkah time and I know we’ll see her again very soon. I’m still happy to have family nearby, as my brother-in-law and sister-in-law live about 45 minutes away and their kids are close in age to ours.
4. My older son’s school. He has a fantastic school program here and his teachers are wonderful. However, I really think his teacher in NJ made a huge difference when it came to getting him to where he is now. I still keep in contact with her, as well.
5. My bosses (a husband and wife) from my job there. I like everyone I work with now and I still have a wonderful boss. It doesn’t mean I don’t miss them as people. My job in NJ was the first one where I felt truly respected and trusted. I also had a great rapport with the wife. We had some kids the same age and always had so much to talk about. I actually set criteria that if we were to move to a new community, I’d want all the women to be like her in terms of personality. I have not been disappointed!
6. Access to Kosher food. There were so many Kosher restaurants by where we lived and the grocery stores had huge Kosher sections, not to mention the all Kosher stores. Also, I miss the Kosher bakery at Costco.
7. My hairstylist. I was reminded of this the other day. I am hoping I’ll find someone just as good out here.
8. Two words: Amazing Savings.
9. Having a bunch of playgrounds in walking distance for Shabbat afternoon play time.
10. As much as I’m not crazy about NYC, it was nice to be close enough to be able to take in a Broadway show every now and then. Not that we got to see all that many (only 3 within 2 years). It was nice for my parents when they came to visit because they’d do a Broadway marathon.

I could come up with a list for what I miss about Illinois, but it really boils down to my family, our friends and deep dish pizza. (All pretty obvious, if you ask me.) Show Tune Sunday at Sidetracks is a nice perk, but it’s not like I got to go all that often. I kind of lost my connection to Chicago after a while and stayed suburban for the most part. I like the shul we went to, but I’m still in touch with anyone from there who wants to make the effort to stay in touch and my husband still gets updates on the latest news.

We plan to stay where we are for a long time, so there won’t be any more “what I miss” lists anytime soon. I do plan to make a list of what I love about being in MD though. Stay tuned….

Date and Eight rhyme!

Since my husband and I met 8 years ago (on February 6th, but it fell on a weeknight during that time), I thought I’d honor the occasion with a list of 8 things you may or may not know about us as a couple:

1. The necklace he made me for our 1 year wedding anniversary is symbolic of a nickname he came up with when we were first dating. It has both biblical and Kosher connections.
2. We play the “Newsies” soundtrack during every road trip.
3. We spent most of our honeymoon playing billiards.
4. Not only were we connected by our love for bowling, but also because we both liked to say “besherte.”
5. We feel that no meal is complete without dessert.
6. If I were to be cloned a thousand times, my husband would be a famous comedian by now. He can make me laugh over the craziest things that no one else would understand or appreciate. :)
7. Our birthdays are both on the 20th of our respective months.
8. My husband asked me out for hot cocoa when we had our first date because neither of us drink coffee. However, I ended up having tea.

Not-so-plain Jane

Another author I like a lot is Jane Porter. Between reading her books and Kristin Hannah’s books, I feel like I know Washington state like the back of my hand, even though I’ve never been there. I started out by reading “The Frog Prince” in late 2007 and followed that up with “Flirting with Forty”. Both were fun, enjoyable stories. Next came “Odd Mom Out,” which spurned a bunch of books about characters to whom the main character was connected. All the books that came out of that connection with Marta have been great stories and very hard to put down. I’m excited for “She’s Gone Country”, for which I just read a description on Amazon. I got to follow Marta’s friend Shey in OMO and “Easy on the Eyes,” based on her friendships with Marta and Tiana, and I’m excited to read more about her this summer when the new book is released. “Mrs. Perfect” was more about Marta’s rival, but it allowed readers to see her from another angle and it spoke to women about a fear we all have to consider in this day and age. “Flirting with Forty” was made into a movie on Lifetime and I enjoyed that too. It followed most of the story, with a few changes. It was cute overall though.
Keep up the great work, Jane!