I first heard about The Other Two when I was browsing HBO Max (before it became Max), but didn't really give much thought to it other than "Oh, Molly Shannon is in this." I actually forgot the show existed after that, but then saw a post from one of the Neo-Futurists I'm friends with on Facebook because she was on an episode (she plays Sheila in season three). I thought, "Okay, I should probably check it out." Then I saw an article blasting Elemental for doing something similar to what Disney did in one of the third season episodes and that sealed the deal for me. I am SO glad I finally got around to watching because it was such a fun and hilarious series. There are times when it takes a serious turn, but there's a good balance overall. It reminds me of Arrested Development and has little hints of Reboot and a few good doses of Curb Your Enthusiasm. I love the satire and how it never takes itself too seriously. And, of course, I love all the LGBTQ+ rep. One of the main characters is gay, so it's there in spades!
The Other Two is about two millennials who are trying to make names for themselves in their careers and just not getting there. Cary is an actor who gets bit parts on commercials and TV series, if he's lucky. We first see him auditioning for a commercial where he has to look like he's smelling a fart. Brooke was a dancer at one point in her life and now she's not really doing much of anything. We first see her trying to sneak out of an apartment she's squatting in. Their thirteen year-old brother Chase is a pop star who was discovered on YouTube and now they're trying to benefit from his fame. Molly Shannon plays their mom and her main focus is on Chase's rise to stardom, which she also ends up benefitting from.
I love so much about this show and I'm sad that there won't be a fourth season, but I'm glad the writers knew that in advance and gave it some good closure. It shines a light on "the industry" in so many comical ways. There are a lot of great supporting characters and tons of celebrity cameos. I love that the two main actors are completely new to me. I've never seen Drew Tarver (Cary) or Heléne Yorke (Brooke) in anything before, but now I want to see them in something else. Cary reminds me of Jason Bateman in Arrested Development, but gay. Brooke reminds me of a young Meg Ryan in some ways. (Fun side note: Heléne's birthday is closer to my daughter's than Kathy's birthday was to Pat's. You have to watch the show to get what I'm talking about.)
Fair warning: The Other Two is VERY raunchy. Lots of sex, nudity, and mature content all over the place. If you're new to the series, do NOT watch with kids in the room. Also keep in mind that some material is offensive on a Curb Your Enthusiasm level. It's not PC for sure. There's one point where I thought they took something a bit too far, even though it still came off as funny in the context of the scene.
Check out this trailer if you haven't seen the series yet, and then stop right there because there will be spoilers below. If you have seen the series, you may proceed...
Thoughts with SPOILERS...
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Cary and Brooke are essentially flawed in so many ways. I wanted to share some thoughts on both of them. As insufferable and/or cringey as they could get sometimes, there was a Zack Morris effect in play, since they're both protagonists and you want to see them "win" as a result. If the show was narrated through anyone else's point of view, you'd probably get so annoyed with Cary and Brooke. Like imagine seeing the show through Curtis and Lance's eyes. I'll wait.
There you go.
Thoughts on Cary:
I like Cary and how openly gay he is throughout the series. I feel like he keeps getting screwed over with his career and that has led him to make some really drastic and stupid decisions. His love life could use a tune-up too. I felt bad for Jess, since it seemed like he really was into Cary and Cary bailed as soon as he got spooked by that level of emotion. And he should have dumped Lucas as soon as he found out about the method acting. Cary also needs to keep his competitiveness and schadenfraude in check when it comes to his friendship with Curtis because that really did come back to bite him. There were other times I just really felt bad for him. Like I just wanted him to catch a break. Through Cary, we get to see how difficult it is to make it with an acting career. And I appreciate that. I also found his wanting to watch people watch him totally relatable.
Thoughts on Brooke:
Brooke is definitely relatable, especially on the career front. I totally felt for her with how she kept dipping her toes in the industry and trying to figure out what she was actually good at. And in season three, she was just so lost. I honestly don't think it's that hard to do good in some way or another, but Brooke was so focused on trying to prove something to the world, or at least to Lance. I was actually impressed at the amount of patience Lance had for her. Especially when she couldn't figure anything out for herself and took it out on him. Somehow, he was still there for her even after their big fight. I was also impressed that Brooke taking the fall for Chase and Pat somehow translated into something big for her career.
Sometimes I felt like Brooke and Cary were two ships passing in the night and other times I really liked their sibling dynamic. I'm glad they were both able to take a step back and reassess where their lives and careers were going.
Favorite supporting characters:
Pat: Obviously, since she's played by Molly Shannon. I also appreciate her kindness and vulnerability.
Streeter: I didn't know an agent could be so dumb, but Ken Marino does it so well with this part. I love how earnest he is too.
Lance: He's too "good" for Brooke, but he still adores her and is so devoted to her.
Curtis: He's generally a good friend to Cary and I feel bad that he doesn't get that in return. I also love that he calls Cary out on his BS.
Lucas Lambert Moy: I love how he commits to each of his characters, much to Cary's chagrin. And then how he gets lost when he doesn't have a role and his Australian accent comes out.
Shuli: I love Wanda Sykes and she's so great in this role.
Chase: He's the backbone to this show. It's fun watching him and seeing how fame affects his life.
I probably listed all the main supporting characters at this point.
Favorite funny moments:
* Brittlynn being eleven years old, but Brooke thinks they're the same age.
* Cary sending a live picture of his butthole and then it goes out to everyone.
* The father and son who are really a gay couple, and the "straight son from Kansas".
* Globby!
* The fake Applebees.
* Streeter thinking everyone has diarrhea on the plane.
* The AIDS play. Need I say more?
* The song for winning at the high school reunion, which sounds like "The Ants Go Marching One by One". The episode had a Romy and Michele appeal to it.
* Pat trying to evade her security staff.
* Jackie Hoffman as the Chase decoy.
* Brooke thinking an old man was pretending to be a sick pre-teen girl and then accusing the grandmother of the same thing.
* Chase's gay brother song
* Brooke stepping in as a backup dancer but trying to get everyone to not dance all sexy in front of Chase since he's a teenager.
* The farm where former girlfriends of celebrities go to stay safe. I loved the video with Ann Dowd.
* Streeter treating his breakup with Pat like a divorce.
* Brooke trying to recruit talent at a kid's birthday party
* Cary shadowing nurses at the hospital and finding out that there were other actors there doing the same thing.
I also liked some of the conceptual stuff in season three, such as people being invisible if they're not in the industry and the Pleasantville situation with Emily Overruled. Really clever and funny.
Actors I recognized:
* Alison Rich as Melanie. She was Valley Girl Erica on The Goldbergs.
* Nadia Dajani as Mackenzie. I remember her from Sex and the City.
* I was surprised about David Lascher playing Mackenzie's brother in the series finale. I knew he looked familiar but wasn't sure why. I think the last time I saw him was on Blossom ages ago. Or maybe in that movie where Melissa Joan Hart kills her parents and blames it on Jeremy Jordan (the pop star, not the Broadway actor).
* Jackie Hoffman as the Chase decoy at the dance (as mentioned earlier). She's a great comedic actress. I actually saw her perform at Second City Northwest when I was a teenager. (Nia Vardalos was performing with that group too.)
* Fin Argus as Lucas, since I recently saw him in Queer as Folk.
* Noah Galvin as the gay guy who is pretending to come out to his "dad." He's engaged to Ben Platt and he also played Evan Hansen at one point. And he narrated one of the characters on the audiobook of What If It's Us by Becky Albertalli and Adam Silvera.
* Tuc Watkins, who played the fake dad of Noah Galvin's character. (I think he also played Brooke and Cary's dad in a flashback scene.) I remember him from Desperate Housewives, but I also saw him on Uncoupled.
* Marcia DeBonis as Kathy. She's been in a lot of small roles on other shows I've watched.
* Greta Lee as Genevieve (Brooke's dance school rival). I saw her on The Morning Show.
* Josie Totah as Elijah in the school dance episode. This was before her transition though. I most recently saw her on the Saved by the Bell reboot.
* Beck Bennett as the "pilot" Brooke was sleeping with. He was on Saturday Night Live.
* Heidi Gardner, also from SNL, as the woman who is helping Pat get high at Chase's birthday party.
* Dana Delaney as Emily Overruled. I think the last time I remember seeing her was on Desperate Housewives.
* Ann Dowd as the lady on the video about sending teenage girls to live on a farm. I haven't really seen her in much but I recognized her right away.
Some cameos I loved:
* Bowen Yang doing an impression of Cary after the butthole incident.
* Lukas Gage in the AIDS play episode, where Cary is trying to get him to give up the porn role. I even love the reference that was made to his role on White Lotus.
* Aidy Bryant. I can't remember what she did, but I just love her anyway.
* Jordana Brewster as the woman the gay-baiter had dated in the past.
* Debi Mazar on an episode of Pat's talk show. I also loved her on Younger.
* Ben Platt, who was supposed to perform at the Night of Undeniable Good.
* Kiernan Shipka as the celebrity Chase gets pushed into marrying before he hooks up with Pam Snot.
* Patrick Wilson, who was trying to help Cary during Watch What Happens Live.
Questions:
Why did Brooke give up her chance to work with Alessia Cara while Cary gave up the family trip to go work on Night Nurse?
Who played the girl who was singing "Ring of Keys" from Fun Home at the school dance in season one? She looks so familiar but I can't find her on IMDb.
If you made it this far, you've obviously seen the series. I'd love to hear your thoughts!
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6. Shtisel: I really hope they'll bring it back for a fourth season. There's still so much they could do with this series and I definitely miss the characters.
11. Hacks: Really funny and well done. A Devil Wears Prada for the comedy circuit. I can see why Jean Smart got the Emmy for Best Actress in a Comedy Series.
12. Little Voice: I'm sad that this only got one season. It's a great show created by Sara Bareilles. I love all the Broadway references, courtesy of Louie. It was nice to see one of the actors in the Dear Evan Hansen movie though.
And Just Like That: It leans toward the cringey side, but that could change next year...
Saved by the Bell reboot: It's funny in regards to nostalgia from the original series (and some great meta stuff) but some aspects tend to be annoying.
See my top five picks at Chick Lit Central, as well! I read so many amazing books this year (go to my Goodreads page and see all the five-star books) and am sad to have to narrow it down at all. Links are to reviews (or Bookstagram posts)
1. The People We Keepby Allison Larkin (leaned more toward YA and New Adult, but was definitely one of the best books I read this year)
The rest is mostly the same from last year, but bears repeating:
*Dan Levy because, like, obviously! ;) (I also wouldn't mind meeting the cast of Schitt's Creek though!)
*Michael Judson Berry: He's so funny with his Schitt's Creek impressions and videos and he seems like he's so down-to-earth and friendly too.
*Randy Rainbow: When have I NOT wanted to meet Randy Rainbow?!? He's saved my sanity since 2016.
Highlights from 2021:
*My family getting the Covid vaccine. We are all now fully vaccinated and my husband and I are boosted. Our oldest will be boosted soon.
*My sister got married and we got to attend her wedding in Chicago and finally meet my new brother-in-law in person. They are perfectly matched and I'm really happy for them both!
*Getting to see my best friend and her husband when we were in Chicago. (My family and I didn't have time to make plans with a lot of people, but we couldn't be in the same city and NOT meet up!)
*Getting to see "Will" again after five long years. He officiated my sister's wedding too.
*I got a new job!!! And it's in a field that actually interests me and is something I want to grow into even more: Book publicity!
* Having Thanksgiving dinner with my in-laws. It was so nice to be back together in person again. I hope we can make things work for Passover, as long as omicron gets under control!
*My kids going back to school in person. It's been good for them, even if it means I get up at 5:45 am!
*Some mini-vacations: Staying at a cabin in the woods, going to Virginia Beach (and spending an entire day at the beach itself), staying at a cozy house for a little winter retreat.
*I made a couple of new friends, which is a challenge in this day and age. Both live nearby and I've already connected with one in person a couple of times. I have lots in common with both of them, as well.
*Getting to see my friend who moved to Florida a few years ago. She was in town for a week and we hung out a couple of times.
*The Chinese food car picnic my husband and I had for our anniversary.
That's a wrap for 2021! Here's hoping there will be an end to this pandemic in 2022.
Got this from a friend's Facebook post
Also got this from a friend's Facebook post
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When my friend Sara told me to watch Workin' Moms, I was skeptical at first, thinking it would be another sitcom like American Mom. I'm so glad I was wrong about that. I was drawn in from the first episode and couldn't get enough! Initially, I had also worried that I wouldn't be able to relate since my kids are not babies anymore. However, one of the moms has a daughter who starts off close in age to my daughter, even though they have completely different personalities.
For those of you not familiar with this series, it's about these women who are in a playgroup together with their babies and they all have a variety of stressors that come with balancing motherhood and their career. Something always has to give, whether it is their romantic relationships, their friendships, their jobs, etc. Toss in some humor and mature content (do NOT watch when kids are anywhere in the vicinity of your TV) and you're all set!
I didn't know when I started watching this series that I'd be going through withdrawal by the end of season four. The show and characters are so relatable and also quirky. The dialogue is snarky and it just works perfectly for this series. Thankfully, season five is already on CBC and should land on Netflix this spring or early summer. I can't wait!
Workin' Moms has some actors from two of my favorite shows: Degrassi: The Next Generation and Schitt's Creek! Side note in regards to Degrassi, one of the main characters is named Frankie Coyne. It always makes me think of Frankie and Declan from Degrassi getting married. There's also a character named Bianca on both shows.
Degrassi actors who were on Workin' Moms: Paula Brancati (Jane) played a mom and news reporter. Jonas Chernick (Wesley's uncle) played one of Kate's clients. Elisa Moolecherry (Sydney) played someone interested in buying a house. Dayo Ade (BLT from Degrassi High) played the love interest of a side character. Two actors from Degrassi Goes Hollywood were on, as well: Paul Amos (Mick) played a client at Gaze and Mary Ashton (Hailey) played Kate's sister. A few other people from Degrassi on Workin' Moms are Jane's mom, who played a rich woman who was interested in Frankie; Mr. Hollingsworth, who played a client of Kate's; Ms. Dawes, who played the principal of a preschool, and the teacher in France, who played someone Kate was helping.
As for Schitt's Creek actors, I only recognized three, but perhaps there were more that I missed. Richard Waugh (Herb Ertlinger) played a love interest for one of the grandmothers, Tennille Read (Golf Club Manager) played Bianca (a character who comes about in season three), and Vanessa Matsui (Lisa Chung, lawyer for The Blouse Barn) played a lawyer on Workin' Moms, as well.
Jann Arden, whose music I really like, played a small role on the series as well. I had no idea it was her until I checked IMDb. Dan Aykroyd had a guest appearance too!
I'm sharing the season one trailer here and will then discuss some spoilers below that. If you haven't watched the series (seasons one through four) yet, stop at the trailer (and start watching the show, if it interests you). If you have, then keep going!
Thoughts on the main characters:
Kate: There is something utterly relatable about Kate Foster. While I can't say I would be as much of a workaholic as she is, even with my kids being much older than hers, I do appreciate what she wants for herself. And when she experienced a huge betrayal, I felt sadder about it than I usually do when someone has that happen to them. I could just feel the hurt emanating from her. Kate is someone I could easily see becoming friends with, as long as she makes time for the friendship. Since Catherine Reitman is the writer of the show, she fits in some humor about an aspect of her appearance. I can appreciate how Kate is self-conscious about it though. I can relate in some ways, as I also don't like how I smile in pictures.
Anne: Anne Carlson is probably my favorite of all the moms on this show. I love how snarky she is and how she tries to balance being a good mom with laying down the law. She's a good friend to Kate, even when she's getting the short end of the stick. I also love how she took down her nemesis.
Side note: Kate and Anne's friendship reminds me of my relationship with my best friend.
Frankie: It took me a while to warm to Frankie, but then I found her to be easily lovable. And those curls! I like that she represents the LBGTQ faction of the show.
Jenny: Jenny can be cute and charming, but then she's also manipulative and self-serving. I never know which one we're going to get and whether I should like her or not. I found out that the actress who plays her was Evie Cho on Orphan Black. It's been ages since I last saw it, but after seeing pictures, I remember her.
Thoughts on the spouses (or ex-spouses):
Nathan: Even after what he did to Kate, he still finds a way to be likable, so much that I was glad they got back together and found a way to make things work. He complements Kate really well. The fact that the actors are married in real life adds to that chemistry.
Lionel: Initially, I found him annoying, but then he grew on me and became a good support for Anne. I definitely prefer him over her first husband.
Ian: Another one who took some time to grow on me. I like how he became part of the moms group in season two. I also like how good-natured he is. I don't like how Jenny treats him.
Gisselle: I really don't like how she was so unsupportive of Frankie during her post-partum depression and then just ended up wanting a divorce. Even after that, she's rude to Frankie most of the time.
Characters I don't like:
Brad: I hate him and his dick face. It was disturbing how he abused his powers and I'm glad he finally got caught for it. I don't think anything was resolved with that situation since his lawyer put Anne in the hot seat.
Mean Nanny: For what she did to Kate, obviously. But I also couldn't stand how much she was judging Anne. Even if she was good with Alice, her job was to be a nanny, not tell Anne how to live her life.
Sean: I knew he was trouble even before Frankie did. What a scumbag!
Steve Malk: I think he was there to satirize a certain former leader of a certain country, but I still couldn't stand him anyway. I think the fact that the same actor was Mr. Hollingsworth on Degrassi aided in that.
Kate's doctor: He just has the worst bedside manner. She needs to switch doctors!
Characters who annoy me:
Juniper: She was okay in season two, but then she had to show up again in season three with that stupid haircut and a somewhat lower IQ. And screwing Frankie over was the tip of the iceberg. I'm glad she was able to help Bianca, but then she should have just moved on.
Val: She's the playgroup leader, but somehow she seems to glom onto the other moms. She had her somewhat helpful moments and I felt bad for her because her sons were such jerks, but she still annoyed me a lot.
Forrest: He was just embarrassing most of the time. I'm glad Nathan convinced him to drop his lawsuit against Kate, even before his father told him to drop it.
Disappearing characters:
Alicia: She was on during the playgroup scenes and then disappeared in season three. I always wished that she would have more time on screen instead of Jenny. She came off as this perfect mom, so it would be fun to see how flawed she is "behind the scenes."
Sonia: I thought she and Ian were going to be in a committed relationship and then she just disappeared starting in season three. What's up with that?!?
There were so many characters between all four seasons that talking about each one would keep me working on this post forever. I also didn't know where to fit some in, such as Mike, the guy who was helping Kate with her PR business and was really hot, but then turned into a bit of a jerk. Or Rosie, the assistant at Gaze, who later became Kate's assistant. She could be helpful but also really annoying, as well. Just not enough to make it to the annoying list.
If you have made it this far, what are your thoughts on Workin' Moms?
Back in December, I decided to give One Day at a Time a try. I had heard some good things about it and that when it got cancelled, there was such an outcry that it ended up coming back for a bit longer. The first episode just seemed like an episode of any other sitcom and I inquired about whether I should keep watching or not. A few friends convinced me to stick with it and I'm SO glad I did! I have been recommending it ever since and I hope this post will convince you to give it a try too.
Originally I was hesitant to watch because Justina Machado was on Jane the Virgin and I wasn't all that fond of her character. So I was worried she'd be annoying on this show too. I'm glad I was wrong about that! Fun fact: Tony Plana plays Penelope's deceased father. Aside from being the dad on Ugly Betty, he was also Gaby's stepfather on Desperate Housewives and Justina played his new wife. (Originally I thought she played another daughter of his, but I checked online and I was wrong once again.) The only thing I wish for this show is that they let her play her actual age. She's a few years older than me, but started the show playing someone younger than I was in 2017. This isn't 90210 where 30 year-olds need to play teenagers. And Justina looks good for whatever age she is.
Before I give my reasons for why you should watch this wonderful show, I need to point out that I don't remember watching the original series from the seventies and eighties. I knew Valerie Bertinelli was on it, but that was about it. I ended up reading more about it on Wikipedia and noticed a few things that made their way onto this reboot series. It was also a show about a single mom with two teenagers and they had a landlord named Schneider. What I didn't realize was that Mackenzie Phillips played one of the teenagers and now she's the group therapy leader on this series. (That explains why there was cheering from the laugh track when she first appeared.) The theme song has similar words, but different stylings: 1970s vs. 2017. I also just recently found out that Gloria Estefan sang the new version. In any case, there are a lot of updates to the show, given when it takes place, and I love that about the reboot.
Reasons you should watch One Day at a Time:
*It's so funny. Sitcoms obviously should be funny, but there are some moments that had me laughing for several minutes after they were over and then thinking about them made me laugh again. There also are a lot of great one-liners. They honestly didn't need a laugh track because none of my laughing needed a prompt. I got used to the laugh track after a while and forgot it was there because I was laughing too loud to hear it anyway.
*Great ensemble cast. There are very few shows I say this about. I've said it about Schitt's Creek and Speechless in the past, and am now bestowing this honor upon One Day at a Time. I love how the cast fits together so well and everyone plays off of each other. I almost felt like part of the Alvarez family while watching this show.
*They deal with real life issues. Even though this is a sitcom, there are times when heavier subjects come up, especially around the topic of mental health. It's handled so honestly and sensitively and is worth watching just for those episodes. They also cover immigration, grief, LGBTQ, alcoholism, divorce, etc. I've actually cried a bunch of times from this show. Not as much as Penelope, but still...
*The show focuses on current events since 2017 and I agree with a lot of what they have to say.
*Rita Moreno. There's a reason she has an EGOT and I would love to see this documentary about her. She is just perfect as Penelope's mother Lydia. She has a lot of funny moments and lines, as well as some heartwarming ones.
*Schneider. He comes off as clueless at times, but then he says something really profound to show he just gets what's going on. I love how he's there for comic relief, but also how he's there in some heavier moments, including some of his own. His friendship with Penelope is one of my favorite platonic friendships between a man and woman and I'm so glad they never got involved romantically. I especially love that he got his own romantic subplot and the woman he loves is perfect for him.
*Dr. Berkowitz. He is the character placed there solely for comedic value, but Stephen Tobolowsky (Ned Ryerson from Groundhog Day and Principal Ball on The Goldbergs) does an excellent job with this role. His non-sexual relationship with Lydia is the best. I love how he dotes on her anyway. He's just as much a part of the family as Schneider is.
*The kids. I like that they are teenagers instead of cute little kids with one-liners. Alex and Elena are both interesting to watch, but I wish Alex was utilized as much as Elena throughout the series. They are both really funny too. Alex reminds me of a cross between my two sons.
*Gloria Estefan is on one of the episodes. You have to wait until season three to see it, but it's worth the wait to see her duke it out with Rita Moreno.
*Penelope is shown as a working, single mom trying to find balance in her life while dealing with PTSD and going back to school. Topping that off is pressure from all her mom's expectations. She's definitely relatable in a variety of ways.
*The curtain...which just has a personality of its own somehow. I love how it is used for emphasis during an entry or argument.
*There's just so much love on the show, which is very much needed in this day and age. Even though people fight and get mad at each other, they hug and make up eventually.
Still not convinced? Check out the trailer (then keep reading afterward):
While the first three seasons on Netflix have thirteen episodes each, the fourth season on CBS (which was previously on Pop TV) only has seven episodes. I really wish it had been able to go a full season, but I think the pandemic cut things short. And "this is it" for the show now.
I hope that it will eventually go the route of sitcoms that got a new life 20-plus years later, like Fuller House, Saved by the Bell, and Punky Brewster (coming soon). In 20 years from now, perhaps Penelope will live with Alex or Elena when they are adults with their own kids. Since Fuller House was a gender switch for the adults and kids (from three men and three young girls to three women and three young boys), maybe it would make sense for Alex to be the main focus. Elena could be the landlord since she learned all those skills from Schneider. They'd need someone to fill Dr. B's shoes, but I'm sure there are some good comedic actors who could do so.
If you're also a fan of One Day at a Time, please share your reasons in the comments.
Blog Project 3.0 has been going on for about two years, even though one of the group members changed after a few months. I love blogging with this group and I hope we can continue to inspire each other.
This week, Darwin Shrugged chose the topic: Let's write about missed callings. Talk about about those jobs or paths you now realize might have been good choices, and why.
First, read what everyone else had to share on this topic. I will be only posting links to posts on this same topic from my group. So check back if you were hoping to read their blogs and don't see a link yet.
When I was in college, I started off in a special ed major before switching to psychology. However, after five years of college, I didn't want to be in school anymore and decided not to go to grad school for a counseling degree. Years later, I considered grad school, but I wasn't in the right place in my life to commit to it, as I wanted to start having kids. Therefore, I sometimes wonder if I would have made a good counselor or even a psychologist, if I had stuck on the path toward getting my Masters degree.
The thing is, I am good at counseling, so-to-speak. I am one of those people that others go to when they need a listening ear or some advice. During the summer of the year I got married, a close friend had a falling out with one of her friends. (I was in the same boat at the time, so I knew how she felt.) Anyway, she came over one night trying to figure out where and how things went wrong. I just listened to her and then gave her some advice that was more about focusing on herself and her own needs, as she rarely ever did that. After that time, she became more confident and a few years later, she met her husband. I don't know if I have anything to do with all of that, but I could definitely see a change once I suggested to her to take care of herself.
I also am the voice of reason and try to make people feel better about decisions (whether those are from my end or theirs). When my husband has a lot on his mind, I'm able to help him put things into perspective and then he feels less overwhelmed.
I've been told that the key to being a good counselor is having gone through counseling yourself. I will admit that I have sought counseling when I was in college. I had some legitimate reasons for doing so and felt it helped in some ways. I did both group and individual counseling at various times. The group counseling wasn't as effective, but I really liked the woman I saw for individual counseling. She was a graduate student at the time and I hope she has had a successful career since then. She's the kind of counselor I would have aspired to be like, had I stayed on this path.
Will I ever get back onto this path? I guess time will tell. I enjoy where I work and don't have the time or patience for graduate school right now. Maybe when my kids are older? Who knows? If it's meant to happen somewhere down the road, I'm sure it will.
The whole topic of psychology and counseling makes me think of this song from You're a Good Man, Charlie Brown. Enjoy!
Did you miss us? Blog Project 3.0 was on hiatus for a few months, but now we're back! This group has been going on for about two years, even though one of the group members changed after a few months. I love blogging with this group and I hope we can continue to inspire each other.
This week, Froggie chose the topic: I would have never imagined... First, read what everyone else had to share on this topic. I will be only posting links to posts on this same topic from my group. So check back if you were hoping to read their blogs and don't see a link yet.
*That I could go to a restaurant where people leave their laptops and cell phones unattended, but someone would rather steal my magazine.
*That the music I grew up with would be grouped into the "oldies" category. Sorry, but Madonna and Michael Jackson do not belong in the same category as Elvis and The Beatles.
*That I'd go from spending Yom Kippur afternoon at McDonald's when I was a kid to spending most of it at Shul as an adult. (Need more of an explanation for this one? Look no further.)
*That I'd finally lose the post-pregnancy weight after three years. I was looking at pictures from early 2014 and now and can definitely see a difference.
*That I'd cave into purchasing a Kindle. It kept me company during the long wait for an oil change earlier this week. Not that I couldn't have brought a paperback, but it's nice to not have my e-reader tied to my computer!
Sometimes I only get the chance to blog once a week. And since I can't always get up the motivation to think of a topic, it's nice to have other friends to blog with so we can take turns. I enjoy being challenged to write about stuff that might not normally come to mind and also reading everyone else's thoughts on the same topic. Blog Project 3.0 has been going on for about a year now, even though one of the group members changed after a few months. I love blogging with this group and I hope we can continue to inspire each other.
This week Moma Rock chose the topic: When you witness someone else making a mistake, what do you do? Do you believe it's a chance for lessons learned, or do you intervene? First, read what everyone else had to share on this topic: Darwin Shrugged Froggie Moma Rock
I will admit I had a hard time coming up with what to say on this topic. It was so broad that I felt the need to narrow it down. And even then, it still felt like it could go so many ways. I didn't feel comfortable talking about witnessing personal, life-changing mistakes because we all make them in one way or another at different times. Then my older son had me check over his homework tonight and I got all obsessive over the spelling errors. I also read what the assignment was asking and felt he didn't do that, so I made him correct his work. He's in third grade and I want him to be accountable. I know my younger son's first grade teacher is more concerned about his handwriting and understanding how sentences work. However, third grade is more complex. My son is smart and is doing well in school, according to the parent-teacher conference I attended. However, I feel the need to correct his homework before his teacher sees it. I don't make the corrections, but I ask him to do it. I'm not as hard on my first grader with his homework, but I will still point out little errors that drive me crazy if they don't go corrected.
I'm not only the Grammar (and Spelling) Police with my family (and believe me, I've corrected my husband on things too), but also with friends. I have this mini-proofreader living in my brain and they won't leave me alone until I make sure errors are fixed at once. Don't even get me started on punctuation either. If I see so much as a comma out of place, I have to intervene! I'm sure I've annoyed people when I've pointed out spelling or grammar mistakes, but other people have appreciated it. I've been known to stand over someone and correct what they're writing as they are going along. I'm like the back seat driver of the writing world. One thing that frustrates me is when a book goes to final print and comes out with errors all over the place. If I were an author and those errors weren't caught before my book went to final print, I'd be fuming! Maybe some authors feel they just have to let it go and hope the readers aren't as obsessive as yours truly.
I don't know why I'm so obsessive about little errors or why it's so important that something looks right. Shouldn't I allow my kids to be kids and let their teachers correct them, if necessary? Why is it so important that their work be turned in with proper spelling and grammar? I feel that I'm preparing them for the future, where a little mistake could cost them in the long run. (I recently witnessed a mistake that could have cost someone a large amount of money, but thankfully the responsible party realized what they did and was able to stop it in time.) Having my kids be accountable for their work and how they present everything is a step in the right direction. After all, I don't want them to be Rachel Green and send off their resumes with a glaring error.
Current mood: annoyed Category: Jobs, Work, Careers
Please do not ask me about my job search, either in person or by e-mail or phone. I don't really want to talk about it until I have something good to say. Right now, I think I'm re-tailoring my skills for a different type of field, but I don't even know if that's the right way to go anymore. And yes, Eitan is in day care while I look, in order to keep my schedule open for interviews (whenever those tend to occur). While it would be nice to have him home with me, he loves it at day care and stays out of trouble that way. He usually has a way more productive day than I do. :P
Anyway, thanks for respecting my wishes.
Follow up: I sometimes think about what place I was in my life when I wrote this post because of the job search frustrations of others. Those frustrations bring me back to this time when I remember being so completely frustrated with my job search. I remember writing this post shortly after talking to some people from my shul at a Hanukkah event. I felt like they were judging me for not only being unemployed but also for not knowing exactly what I wanted to do. I just knew that I wasn't motivated and my husband was trying to help me get into a different field that didn't feel right for me. I felt like I was lying by even saying that was the field I was going into. It was a really uncomfortable position in which to be. I had been searching for 7 months with nothing to show for my efforts (except for the one offer that was rescinded because of my Shabbat and holiday observance). It didn't matter to me that my husband had a job because the cost of living in NJ was high and it was pertinent that we both had jobs in order to stay afloat. I also felt that it was something personal and constantly wondered what I was doing wrong on my resume or during interviews.
I landed the part-time medical billing job less than two months later. I had reached a point by then where I was a month away from giving birth and needed something flexible that didn't require a lot of travel. While I was happy about this job, I still got the impression that people thought I wasn't pulling my weight in the home. I'm sorry, but they weren't the ones taking care of my kids and getting all the household chores and errands done. There wasn't enough time in the day and I appreciated the time flexibility the job afforded me. I ended up enjoying my job, even though the work itself was mundane. I knew that what I was doing was important for the business to run smoothly and my bosses respected me in ways no other boss had respected me before. It motivated me to work harder and know that even if my job was seen as "minor," I was contributing to the greater good. Thankfully, that job was all I needed to launch myself into my current job after we moved. It showed that I had recent work experience and I received a great reference from my boss.
In any case, I just wanted to use my blog from late 2007 to show that I did reach a point in my life where I thought I had hit rock bottom career-wise. I'm thankful that people took a chance on me and that I took a chance on them in turn.
I have a few friends who knit and blog and we've decided to embark on a blog project that has nothing to do with knitting. We're going to take turns coming up with a topic every Thursday and we each have to blog about it by the end of that day and post links to each others' blogs so that people can see our different perspectives on the same topic.
Check out the backstory about how the project was conceived and how we all came together.
This week’s question has been brought to us by Charmingly Random: As a child, what did you want to be when you grew up? As a grown up, did you choose the profession you wanted as a child? If you didn't, what drew you to the profession you have?
If you just met me on the street today or even just got to know me more recently, you would have no idea that I first wanted to be a veterinarian when I grew up. As a kid, I grew up with a lot of pets. That meant many trips to the vet for us. I always enjoyed accompanying our pets on these “adventures.” The vet was really nice and referred to them as “beasties.” I would then go home and play vet with my stuffed animals. I think I changed my career choice when I found out that vets have to euthanize animals sometimes. I couldn’t even imagine doing that, no matter how much the animal was suffering. I also think the jar with the dog heart that was infested with heartworm grossed me out and that also contributed to my loss of interest in the veterinary field. Not to mention that I didn’t want to be peed on by an animal I didn’t live with on a daily basis (that was gross enough in itself).
Eventually I decided I’d rather be an orthodontist because I was getting braces and I thought our orthodontist’s office was really cool. I also knew that orthodontists didn’t have to give root canals or pull teeth. However, I changed my mind about that when I couldn’t stomach the idea of having my hands inside peoples’ mouths all day long, whether or not I had protective gloves on. And I didn’t want to contribute to the torture that was an accumulation of impressions and the painful first days of braces.
I am now a grown-up (at least I tell that to my kids) and I work in the field of my religion, at a non-profit organization. This is the first job I can honestly say that I truly love (while I loved the people I worked with at my job in NJ, there’s something different about where I am now). I talk about it all the time and am proud to tell people where I work and what I do. I know I am almost starting over in my career by being an administrative assistant again, but I feel that there are a lot of places to go within this organization and I see myself staying here for a long time. There are people who have been here for over 20 years and I admire their dedication to the organization and to their job. I’d love to one day be able to tell newcomers that I’ve been here for 20 plus years and about all the things I’ve done here and the people I’ve met. I truly feel a sense of longevity here. When I was first looking for jobs after college, a job at a Jewish organization interested me, but I didn’t have the same passion I have now. When I was in NJ, I also tried to find jobs in the field of Judaism but had no luck. The first interview I had out there was for a Jewish organization on Wall Street, but the commute was too long to justify being there every day. I had a kid to worry about, as well. I also interviewed at some other Jewish organizations but they required work on Sundays and that wasn’t something to which I felt I could commit. I also envied a girl who was the Jewish liaison for the local hospital. It sounded like such an amazing and meaningful job. I ended up working for an Orthodox couple and helping them with an aspect of their medical billing business. While the business itself had nothing to do with Judaism, I liked that we were able to connect on that level and that I didn’t have to worry about taking time off for Shabbos or holidays. When I landed the interview (and then the job) at my current organization, I was ecstatic! (Of course, I felt even better once I had childcare lined up for after school hours.) I’ve been at this job for almost 5 months and feel like I’ve been here for years. It may not be curing pets or straightening teeth, but it’s meaningful to be here and that’s what’s important to me now.
This past weekend, I saw “Post Grad.” I was expecting it to be a laid back comedy that didn’t require much thought. However, I ended up laughing most of the time and also cringing in sympathy with the main character (Ryden, played by Alexis Bledel) every so often. Why would I cringe in sympathy, you ask? It’s because after I graduated college, finding a job was the biggest challenge in the world. Like Ryden, I thought I’d be able to land the first job for which I interviewed. That ended up turning into days and nights of sending off my resume, countless interviews that went nowhere in the end and lots of frustrated tears. I even had the computer tests at the job agencies memorized! Like Ryden, I also had to live with my family while on the hunt for something that would allow me to live on my own. (It got to the point where I would take anything that involved sitting in front of a computer.)
Toward the end of my first post grad summer, my dad hooked me up with a short-term contract position. It was in the city at a very modern looking office. I liked it at first, but then my boss became a very difficult person to please. Thankfully, the contract was only for a month and then I had to start looking again. It was nice to have some experience to add to my resume for the time being. And after only a few more interviews, I quickly landed another job, this time more long term as an administrative assistant.
This job was back by where I grew up, which was a little hike from my parents’ house, but good once I moved into the condo five months later. I quickly got comfortable in my role and got to know the other people I worked with. It had a similar feeling to Dunder Mifflin with lots of office “stereotypes.” Most of the staff was really nice and there were a few people around my age with whom to socialize. The department had some fun things going on, such as people bringing in donuts and bagels every Friday, holiday parties, desk decorating contests (during holiday time), people who acknowledged birthdays, etc. Sometimes I’d go out for drinks with co-workers on a Friday evening. My boss was relatively nice. She had her uptight moments (ones during which I dreaded being “summoned” to her office), but she also had a grandmother-like quality that I felt comfortable around. I was able to talk to her about personal stuff as needed. One of my favorite people there was the receptionist. She took over for another one whom I had gotten to know and like briefly. She was my best friend at the office and I always enjoyed stopping by her desk for a chat. She definitely made my time at the job more enjoyable and interesting. I could equate her personality to Erin from "The Office," if that says anything. However, things came to a point where I really felt I'd be better off someplace else. I was excited when an opportunity at a new cellular business came up toward the end of 2000....
I managed to attain that job and got to start all over again. It was by the airport, but I didn't mind because I was going to the city a lot anyway. Right after I started the job, I became close friends with a guy who was in a similar position to me. With my knack of attracting gay guys at that time in my life (which I'll blog about more another time), he and I were a perfect fit. We'd hang out together a lot and listen to the same music or check out the theater and club scene together. In any case, my first boss at this new job was very similar to Michael Scott in personality. He was probably more professional, but his sense of humor and laid back attitude were on par. The team I worked for (as well as the office, in general) was full of young people (including lots of hot guys). I was still in a supporting role, but with more responsibilities. It was exciting to launch a company in a city as huge as Chicago. I also connected with one of the sales managers and we'd drink tea and chat every morning. Things were going really well for a while and then my friend left right after the 9/11 attacks. I took on his role for a while, which meant long days and nights at the office. I also got my BFF a job there around that time. However, things continuously changed and management shifted around. I didn't like my new boss and also didn't appreciate how the new regional manager was so into micromanaging. While there were still fun social aspects, by spring of 2002 (when my BFF left), I was ready to look around again. That took me another year and a half of going out to interviews on lunch breaks and after work. I did put it on hold for a while when I made a new friend there in early 2003. Then when she left later in the year, I decided to resume my search. This didn't take as long and by November I was at a new company closer to home again.
However, I regretted being hasty in taking on a new job just to leave behind what I had. Especially when I found out that I’d have to keep a cell phone with me 24/7 to take work related calls. I don’t remember hearing about that in the interview or I wouldn’t have been so eager to take on this new role. The calls inhibited me from fully keeping Shabbos and they would wake me up at 3 a.m. sometimes. Once my phone didn’t ring at all for some reason and it was during an emergency. My first boss was mad about it but then I explained what had happened and he backed off. It prompted me to look for other jobs shortly after I got married, but then I gave up on it after a while. There was very little I liked about this job and still managed to stick around for the entirety of the 3 year contract. There were several shifts in management and I only liked the manager who was there from after I returned from my maternity leave in late 2005 (which was unpaid due to an annoying miscommunication) until about March of 2006. Then the boss who took over next was full of himself and not the easiest to work with. I started looking around for jobs again that summer. When I found out that our contracts were not being renewed in December of that year, I was elated. I decided to take the time to be a mom and also start a home business.
Needless to say, the home business venture did not work out. About this same time was when we moved to NJ. Then the job search began all over again. However, it was even more torturous this time around. I will never complain about needing 3 months to find a job after college when it took me 10 months to find one in NJ. I had job experience, but I guess that didn’t count for anything. I had received an offer for one job halfway through this time. However, it fell through when they realized that I’d need to leave early on Friday in the winters for Shabbos and would need to take off a lot of time during Yom Tov season in the fall. My husband even tried to get me into a different career field in hopes of finding a better job. However, the field didn’t feel right for me and I burned out quickly. By the time I was 7 or 8 months pregnant with my younger son, he told me to just find something part-time to bring in at least some money. That’s when I found my medical billing job.
More details about my time at the medical billing job can be found here. Needless to say, it was a blessing in disguise! The owners were Orthodox so I didn’t have to worry about Shabbos or holidays hindering my ability to get the job. They also understood about my upcoming delivery, as they were expecting one around the same time. It was a lot of tedious work, but it kept me honest and I liked the people I worked for so much that I wanted to do my best so that they could focus on their work without worrying about dealing with a lot of errors or slow progress. I managed to get things done quickly and as error-free as possible. I’m detail-oriented and obsessive, along with being a quick typist, so this was the perfect position for me at the time. I was sad about leaving them behind when I moved, but I put out ads to help them find someone new. They eventually found someone on their own and I hope she appreciates working for them as much as I did.
Before and after our move to MD, I looked for jobs in the area. I had a few interviews shortly after the move, but nothing came of them. Then I had an interview in early November that has changed my life for the better ever since! I’ve been at my current job for 3 months now. I absolutely love it here! My boss is wonderful and I like all the people I work with. I was annoyed during blizzard week that I couldn’t be at work. I even did some work from home that week (while some of it was mandatory, I did some other work to keep information current). I voluntarily help with the tedious work (stuffing envelopes, sorting papers, etc.) because I like being able to help out other departments. I like the whole team feel that the office gives off. There is not the political atmosphere that I’ve dealt with at past jobs. I’m working in the field of Judaism, which I am passionate about for obvious reasons. I love that everyone I work with is also passionate about their jobs. I loved the fundraiser event we recently organized and worked at on a normal day off. My responsibilities got shifted a lot that day, but I enjoyed helping out in whichever way I could. There are people who have worked here for over 20 years. I could imagine working here for the next 20 years or more and seeing my career flourish in this environment. While I liked the people I worked for at my medical billing job, this is the first job I can say that I truly love!
A while back, my husband was talking to one of our friends about what our purpose is at our jobs. He came up with the epiphany or realization (based on what his friend said about his wife) that I just like to be really good at what I do when I’m working someplace. While that is definitely the case, it helps a lot to like where I work. I only hope my husband will find a job that he likes better than his current one. (His job environment and boss are completely the opposite of mine and it’s taking its toll on him.) It truly makes all the difference when you are able to wake up and know that you are excited to take on a new day at work!
I have a few friends who knit and blog and we've decided to embark on a blog project that has nothing to do with knitting. We're going to take turns coming up with a topic every Thursday and we each have to blog about it by the end of that day and post links to each other's blogs so that people can see our different perspectives on the same topic. Here are the other blogs: Froggie Knits Like Crazy Charmingly Random Desperate Madness
The first topic, which I chose, is "My most unexpected friendship." This has nothing to do with the method in which we made friends, but more about the nature of the friendship itself or about the people involved.
Here goes: I have had several jobs over the last 10 years. At all jobs, my boss was truly my superior and a role I had to work under and respect. I've gotten along with some bosses and just tolerated others till I could find something better or until the job ended altogether. I got along really well with one manager at a past job and we'd have "tea talks" every morning, but he wasn't directly my superior, so it doesn't count the same way.
When I was living in NJ, I was hired for a job doing part-time medical billing for a privately owned company. It was a new field for me, but I just needed strong typing skills and an eye for detail. My bosses were a husband and wife team that owned the company. I originally thought I'd just be working for the husband and had the most interaction with him for a while. He was very nice, but we mainly talked about work-related stuff. I had limited work interaction with the wife when I started out, but I'd see her at the end of my training shift and we'd talk when we had the chance. She and I were both due with our babies around the same time, so we had that common bond. The couple was Orthodox, so we also had some things in common on that end. (I'm Modern Orthodox, so there were some things I did on a more secular level, but we still could relate on a lot of topics.) As I continued to work for them, I'd come by to drop off papers (I was doing most of the work from home) and would end up chatting with the wife for an hour or so. Eventually, I brought my kids over to play with their kids. Especially since our babies were 2 weeks apart. During the first summer that I worked for them, they invited us for a Shabbos meal while we were checking out their neighborhood as a potential community for us to settle into. My husband had a lot to talk about with my male boss and our kids enjoyed playing together.
Early last year, I decided to take on some more responsibilities with my job, which required me to work at their house once a week. I enjoyed this time because I could do my work and talk with the wife the whole time, when she wasn't on phone calls.
The whole job overall was a great arrangement in terms of flexibility. We'd also get gifts for each others' kids on birthdays and holidays and gave each other shalach manot last year for Purim. Nothing was expected on either end, but we enjoyed being able to share in such special occasions and holidays.
When we decided officially to move to MD, telling my bosses was one of the hardest things ever, harder than telling my friends and acquaintances or even my older son's teachers. This was because I enjoyed working for them and I had formed such a special connection with the wife. I gave them plenty of time to find someone new before I left and even helped them look for new employees on my own time. I still stay in touch with the wife and we share the latest news in our lives and in our families' lives. When I was going through the hiring process for my new job, she gave them an amazing referral that completely sealed the deal. She even shared with me what she told them and it was incredibly sweet. We had a great professional relationship aside from our friendship. Both she and her husband trusted me and it motivated me to do my best. I hope we'll continue to stay in touch, as this is a special friendship that I still cherish. I also hope that anyone who works for them currently or in the future will realize how wonderful their bosses are and will want to work as diligently as I did to continue to help their business thrive.
The reason this friendship is unexpected is because I never expected to be close friends with anyone I worked for and I am very happy that this is the opportunity I had to establish such a friendship.
