Less than a year to go....

I recently came across this article about 10 epiphanies you should have by age 40, which was perfect timing with my last year of my thirties laid out ahead of me. (As of today, only nine months to go!) I agree with some and disagree with others, so I wanted to share my thoughts on each of these items.


1. You are not a role. 

I definitely agree with this. I don't feel like I fit in any particular definition or stereotype.

2. Your weight is probably your weight.

I also agree with this sentiment, to an extent. Although I did lose the final post-baby pounds, I still fluctuate around a certain range and haven't really lost more since. However, I'm more comfortable with my body and am accepting of how I look at this point in my life. I don't plan to gain back what I lost and don't want to completely make-over my wardrobe for the sake of losing even more weight. I'm happy maintaining what I've worked to achieve.

3. 95% of what other people do has nothing to do with you.

I've always felt that and don't see a need to compare myself to other people. Everyone is at their own pace in life. Do I envy people who get to go on vacations whenever they want? Who doesn't?!? Still, life is not a race.

4. Your body is for you.

Definitely. I'd rather be comfortable than squeeze myself into Spanx or wear extremely uncomfortable shoes just to impress.

5. There's no "the one." By the time you're 40, you've fallen in love and you've fallen out of love and maybe in again. You change and what you want in a partner changes. Someone who was "the one" at 25 might not be anyone you'd want to spend even 30 seconds with at 40. It's okay to let that go and seek out someone new.

Disagree!!! I met my husband when I was 25 and still want to be with him forever.

6. You can get a lot of joy out of being ordinary. 

Given I'm content to just read a book, just like a huge chunk of the world's population, I would have to agree with this.

7. The people who show up are your real friends. 

Depends on how you define "show up." I can't see some of my closest friends in person all that often, due to distance. I would base this more on how often we communicate or how much of a presence they are in my life in general. I have stopped trying with the friends who can't seem to make any effort in return.

8. There's no algorithm that guarantees a perfect kid, or even a reasonably happy, well-adjusted kid. 
For sure. I sometimes worry that I'm screwing up my kids but then everyone tells me how nice and polite they are or how well they're doing in school. I do my best to show them that I love them, but also feel that I need to set boundaries now or I'll pay for it sometime in the future.

9. Friendships are fluid, and sometimes they're site- and time-specific. 
I can't say I have every single thing in common with my closest friends. Just like I can't say that I make friends with someone just because we're moms or work together or live on the same street. I have a certain "chemistry" with certain friends and have given up on trying to be someone I'm not to impress anyone else.

10. We are not hiding anything. We all try to put on a good face, to present our best selves. But you know how you can sense that other people are secretly very angry, or depressed, or basically happy but having a rough time right now? They can see the same thing about you. This goes doubly for our kids. Our kids will see us more clearly than we will ever see ourselves, and there's nothing we can do about that.
Should I be scared? I wonder what kind of impression I've been giving off lately....